THIS IS IT....
The end of an era.
Tonight Mothership and Dad will show up to take me and all my possessions back to London.
CL will move to UDOBF's place until her new course starts in September back in her home of Bristol.
MH will be moving to her little flat in Sheff ready to start her masters.
Me? I'll be dossing round the house until the football season starts again and I can return to Derby and Halls in September, until my Exams in January, when I REALLY will be finished.
Everything is packed now, crockery, posters (room looking very bare!) The England flag flying proudly next to my charlton pennant (which used to get a laugh from the West Ham supporting postman and the kids from the local school) is gone. EVERYTHING is packed.
Its kinda sad, despite all the traumas and crises, the gas leak, the Earthquake, the dodgey housemates, the shit landlords, me and MH have dealt with these things with a laugh and a giggle.
She knows me pretty much as anyone and I know her.
No more late night chats about dodgey relationships (hers mainly), no more late night trips to Saddlers, no more horror movie marathons, no more spur of the moment decisions to go watch the footy at the Friary.
No more chats on the stairs with CL, no more me and MH conspiring to find out her latest lie.
No more talking about our childhood and life experiences.
Its all over.
Sure we'll remain friends, but i think maybe the closeness will go, of course we'll still talk and msn and visit each other and go to football games together, but it wont ever be the same.
Despite Dad's illness, (and I would gladly swap all those things for him to be well and the cancer to go for good), despite the stress as it has shown that I am clearly NOT cut out for the academic side of uni life and have struggled throughout, these 3 years have been the best of my life.
Without her I would not have developed as a person, would still be convinced that I am worthless. Would not have come to terms with the way my head works and the way that my life has turned out.
Tonight I go home to Charlton and everything changes.
I've told MH that she is not to cry - sometimes she is such a girl - but I know she will be in tears the minute the car reaches the end of the drive.
Its not like I'll never see her again. I'll be visiting for her flatwarming party (hopefully LF will be there and we can sort stuff out once and for all).
I'll be visiting once I get back to Derby.
But we won't be living together.
I don't believe in regrets, or goodbyes.
So I'll tell her it isn't goodbye - except to our house, and what's that apart from bricks and mortar?
It's only see you later.
And I will see her soon