Thursday, May 27, 2004

this thread on owlsonline has made me giggle all day, not helped me get any revision done, but its made me laugh.
Exam was shocking, definately a retake in Dec!
Have discovered that Jena is now sleeping with a 17yo. This has led to 2 major things.
1 - The inevitable pisstake, comments about not being able to get a girl his own age (7yr difference) and jokes from me.
2 - The Green eyed monster has kidnapped MH and put an imposter in her place, since finding out on monday, she's made random jokes and gone on a little (ok a lot) about how she's not over him, this wasnt supposed to happen and her ending it with him was supposed to get him to see sense and go back to her.
To tell you the truth, it dont sound like jena, well not the jena i know anyway, he met her on sat. S got off with her, Jena had a one night stand, she got off with her ex and they became offical on monday.
To me it sounds like someone on the major rebound, but not like jena at all. I dunno, the pair of them are daft.

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Mammalian Reproduction tomorrow.
I feel sick about it, spent most of the day trying to revise and I dont know anything, this isn't some kind of panicky exam nerves blog.
I really dont know a thing.

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

hehe. Someone On the owls rivals board that I go has sent me a special message.. Im more popular than MH!
Do you know what the worst thing about Derby in the Summer is?

When your room faces the window, specifically that part of the window that is not covered up by the curtain, you wake and see the very, very bright sunshine and assume that it is later than you thought,
You squint but without your glasses you can't make out the clock numbers on the radio at the other end of the room, by the time you have found your glasses and put them on, you are fully wide awake...
The Clock radio reads 6:30

Exam was shit, only one of the topics I had revised came up, wish I had revised crickets but didn't on principle of having it shoved down my throat since Xmas.

Went out drinking last night, pound a bottle down our Friary, and me and Helen only need to spend £12 each to be wasted.
Found STF (Shrewsbury Town Fan) and V,A,J, went to Bishop's next door, then to the open Mic night at the Scream club attached to Friary.
There is something very nice about being mildly drunk and hearing the whole club sing along to the guy at the mic.
We sang "Under the Bridge", "Dreaming of you" by The Coral, "Lovely day," "Living on a prayer" and that one i can never remember the title of. "Call me Al?" I dunno.
Anyway, back from my driving lesson and all I can say is:
Oi! Liverpool hands off! Or I'll come round & cut Owen & Gerrards balls off - with a spoon! - yeah now ur scared, ain't ya?

Should revise, am going to revise, may go see the Twins later, they have LOTR3.

Sunday, May 23, 2004

100 things!

1 - No one can spell my name correctly, I have swimming certificates with the wrong name on and my student loan is also to the wrong person.
2 - I tried to claim that this meant it didn't have to be paid back.
3 - My dad is suffering from cancer, he has had his left kidney and parts of his lung removed, at the moment he has a growth on his adrenal gland, liver, lungs and on his ribs.
4 - Cancer runs in my family.
5 - *updated* He did die.
6 - I am left handed.
7 - I prefer punk to heavy rock and dislike pop, however I love, LOVE dancing to cheesy music
8 - I have been horse riding since I was 4, however this doesn't mean my family is posh or rich.
9 - In fact we were very poor growing up
10 - It took me a long time to cry over my Dad's death, and I only did so the once. I dont do crying very well.
11 - I have a morbid fear of being seen as weak, pathetic or girly.
12 - I have a younger brother.
13 - Charlton Athletic have been an obsession for over ten years now, I have followed them all over the country.
14 - I fear Tomatos, there is something sinister about the goo that comes from them.
15 -I used to loathe bananas, however I've started eating them again recently.
16 - I can obsessively eat cheesecake or any sweet things.
17 - As much as I try I can't click my fingers.
18 - I love watching sports, however I can't play them to save my life, this upsets me greatly.
19 - My mum has told me that my life is worthless
20 - I have overheard her tell people that she would have rather had my brother than me.
21 - I blame myself for this, and am still at times trying to convince myself that I AM not worthless.
22 - I suffer from a lack self confidence possibly because of that.
23 - I once ate a grasshopper, deep fried in a lecture.
24 - It tasted like very burnt toast.
25 - I get very bored, very quickly.
26 - Best uni Practical ever? The Cryo-preserved bull semen day.
27 - Best field trip ever had to be the day at RAF Donna Nook watching the seals, not only did we see ickle babies, but got to watch the RAF dropping bombs and made a vague attempt to steal the sign that said "Do not touch military debris, it may explode and kill you."
28- I find it hard to talk to people, even those I have known all my life
29 - I will pretend that everything is ok, even when I feel like crying.
30 - I have a really wierd thing about bruises. I think they're beautiful.
31 - I studied Zoology at uni and somehow scraped a 3rd, I'm currently studying a Post Grad in Equine Science.
32 - I adore the sea, even if it means swimming in all my clothes.
33 - I used to have a phone phobia, I still get sick at the thought of ringing someone, even someone I know well. However I worked on the switchboard at a National Museum.
34 - I learnt to scuba dive. I've been a few times and it was amazing. Everyone should try it.
35 - I like to dye my hair, its been blue and red/purple and on a few memorable occasions red, blue, purple, pink, blonde as well as natural brown all at once.
36 - Marmite? Surprisingly I neither like nor dislike it, it just is.
37 - I would rather go to the pub and watch the football than go clubbing.
38 - I eat ice cream and Pickled onions. Together.
39 - I can turn my hand right round in a circle. It needs to be seen to be believed.
40 - I went paintballing on my 18th and loved it
41 - My motto is I'd rather regret having done something, than regret not doing it.
42 - I have no regrets, wishes that I'd handled things differently yes, but no real regrets.
43 - I got into uni, despite having no C grade GCSE maths.
44 - When they asked me if I had the 5 required I said yes.
45 - The 5th was for Drama.
46 - I have failed my driving test 10 times. I refuse to count the last one, punctures don't count!
47 - I have spent the night, sleeping rough in a train station.
48 - I resat my Maths GCSE and got a D nearly 10 years after taking it originally. My first score was an F.
49 - I have Bungee jumped, parachuted (pictures HERE) and been white water rafting.
50 - I can speak very basic Spanish and lived in a Bumpkin Town in Northern Spain for seven months.
51 - I genuinely miss Watercolour Challenge. I'm not arty in the slightest though.
52 - I failed half the A levels I took.
53 - I have a E grade at English Literature A level.
54 - I failed Biology A level.
55 - I believe this to be down to the people in my class.
56 - People in my secondary school hated me - I was bullied but rarely physically or verbally - it was emotionally.
57 - I have always got on better with guys than girls.
58 - I have acted upon Shakespeare's Globe Theatre.
59 - I was Bottom for some bemused Japanese Tourists.
60 - Jim never fixed it for me.
61 - Best book I've ever read? Draw between To Kill a MockingBird and Wuthering Heights
62 - I have been shot with a BB gun. Deliberately. Jerk.
63 - I met my boyfriend on an internet forum
64 - For the first three months we were in contact, he believed I was male.
65 - My favourite karaoke song is Ernie the Fastest Milkman in the west. Youtube it.
66 - I REALLY REALLY want a horse of my own.
67 - I will listen to anyones problems but do not consider myself sympathetic.
68 - I am easily distracted.
69 - I'd be a vegetarian but I don't like vegetables... or the quorn/meat replacement things.
70 - Ben and Jerry's Ice-cream is my reason for living.
71 - This is actually a lot harder than it looks!
72 - Crunchy peanut butter will always be the worlds greatest sandwich filling and will beat smooth anyday.
73 - I spent my 17th Birthday up a mountain.
74 - I miss my dog a lot, I'm definately a dog person over cats.
75 - I am terrified of the thought of growing old.
76 - I have my ears pierced but do not wear earrings.
77- This is the reason I do not have any other piercings although I would like some more.
78 - I would consider a tattoo.
79 - I have caused a man to cry.
80 - I always wanted to work with animals, but am slowly accepting this will not happen.
81 - I believed that my dad only married my mum because she had me.
82 - Sometimes I felt that I was resented for this.
83 - I am also paranoid.
84 - I don't like children, despite that little obstacle I applied (and failed) to do a Primary PGCE. It was probably for the best.
85 - My brother threw a shoe at me and hit me, he has also hit me with a baseball bat. I don't think we really get on...
86 - I have been to Florida, Lanzarote and Malta, Iceland (pictures HERE) Ireland, New Zealand (also click here), Italy New YorkIndiaLas Vegas, various parts of Spain, including Madrid and Barcelona and Lisbon in Portugal.
87 - Best holiday ever? The one I'm planning!
88 - I once camped in my garden, the foxes crept into the tent, stole my trainers, ran away with them, chewed them up and urinated in them. I didn't dare go out to chase them away as I had been shitting myself reading Stephen King - I was 14 at the time.
89 - At the moment I am listening to Cliff Richard - I like Cliff.
90 - I believe that there is someone out there for everyone but the chances of finding them is very small and most people settle for they'll do.
91 - I like to think I'm a realistic optimist.
92 - I believe in fate, but I believe we can do a lot to alter and affect that fate.
93 - Nature Vs Nuture? Nature.
94 - I would only consider getting married if it meant a great deal to the person I was with.
95 - I am a bad karoke singer - Once you've done it once it's a bad habit to get into, especially when you're clinically tone deaf.
96 - I once ate trifle for 3 days, nothing else. I don't recommend it.
97 - I was London School's Equestrian Champion 3 years running. It sounds better than what it really is.
98- Despite being crap at maths I won a prize for it, me and my mate gave our work to his nan to do.
99 - I day dream a lot and write stories that I rarely finish.
100 - I would like to get one published but am not that good.
Screw uni, i'm running away to become a Ben and Jerry's taste tester... whatever happened to Chubby hubby with the pretzels?

or on another note.

Come on, is this not the funniest word ever?
I have done exactly 2 hours worth of revision all day, kinda on the "its too nice to revise so i will get stupidly high on ice cream and eat a stupid amount of ice lollies (15) in order to spite evil uni lecturer people
Today I have made a important discovery.
My hair that i dyed dark blue, and disappointedly turned to black within days, is now black with what looks suspiciously like blonde streaky bits.
I am slightly confused by this as apart from highlighting it this time last year so i could go blue, pink, red, purple yellow as well as natural brown ( I was the Original girl with 5 colours in her hair!). I have not dyed it blonde.
Also I could handle having interesting brown roots growing out of the blue/black. But this dirty, poo coloured brown is not very nice, as much as I appreciate my hair going interesting colours for me, this is not a colour I would have chosen.
Oh well, the question is after it all goes out and I give it some time to recover (my hair dislikes being coloured and goes on strike by refusing to stay attached to my head) do i go Purple or Bright red?

Saturday, May 22, 2004

did a fair amount of work on IPM - integrated pest management today, watched the FA cup final, feeling very dirty as I wanted Millwall to win.
This time last year, me and CL drove to York and went on a piss-up to celebrate Jena's b'day.
That was when I met LF and became somewhat obsessed, an obession that has refused to go away.
I know why it is, its because he was the only guy that has ever expressed an interest in me and that I liked enough to be interested back.
I hope when we go up to York in a fortnight, he will be there and we can have a chat, I miss my friend.

Friday, May 21, 2004

How funny....
Wewent on a night out with MH and Her coursemate a few weeks ago (7th april).
This Coursemate went on a sports outing to Spain, She was infectious with mumps and has now caused this, this and this too!

Went on a late night celebratory trip to The Worlds Nicest Takeout (tm) last night, to celebrate me finishing 2 exams and MH getting all her work in, bar dissertation.
I LOVE saddlers, all these years we've been going wrong and going to Tuminose (Slogan - listen to your tummy and follow your nose - to Tuminose!)
Saddlers does the Nicest Pizza, Keddie Chippie - the nicest chips - shame no one here seems to know what a savaloy is or even how it should be served.
And that mad red and yellow takeout does the Best doner and chips.

Anyway.... Where was I?
Oh yeah, today have been trying to revise for Entomology AKA We All Love Crickets. Except Karim is soo vague, we dont have a clue what to revise except cricket sex.
Went into uni to find the books that I had reserved on the other topics but cant find any.
Dick - Piss - Wank.
Still baffled about what to revise except I know I'm going to spend hours pissing on the internet to find journal articles.
And my computer has died again.
*sigh* Back to MH's Dyslexia freebie.

Thursday, May 20, 2004

I hate people, I keep coming to the same conclusion.
I am not a people person, I find it hard to talk to people I don't know very well, although being in uni has helped slightly, but im still madly shy.
I hate the way people can mess with your head.
Like my parents today, Mothership rang me all excited because she got tickets to see HP3 - which we have been waiting for, for ages only she got them on wednesday. The wednesday Helen is coming to stay and we are going to see Ireland play.
This is my fault because I told her Wednesday would be ok, I don't remember this, I have a notoriously bad memory so maybe I did, I don't know.
I just remember her telling me she would try to get them for Thursday and I may have said Wednesday and Saturday I am taking Helen to Ireland, I may have said Tuesday, I dont recall.
Anyway, I now have to pay for mine and Helens tickets - cant ask her too, she didnt even want to see Harry Potter3.
I now have an awful image that maybe I did say to Mothership that, that day is ok, I just dont remember.
I know that I have bust her bubble as much as mine is bust cos I so wanted to see it and the tickets are non-refundable.
I KNOW she is sitting at home, telling Dad that I'm useless, that I got grumpy with her down the phone like it is her fault, when it was mine.
I hate people, I hate the way they can get me feeling so physically sick like this, not knowing if it is my fault, 98% sure that it ain't. But there is that 2% that isn't.

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

EEK! that long since a post...
Well I have been really busy, what with exam revision - first one tomorrow and I know nothing - literally!
plus hiding from the ball police, (we survived the whole night and i made a new best mate in a addick! hopefully he will get in contact and we'll go to some away games) I've been neglecting stuff lately and i'd like to keep this up to date.
But what's all this stuff? Its all spanky new, kinda scary really.
Football was great at the weekend and i miss it already! only 60 days till first preseason friendly at welling!

Thursday, May 06, 2004

Went on two field trips today - And no none of them was to Marketon Park! We went to Larksale (sp?) somewhere outside of Bakewell.
Found a new friend - An Owl! We had a nice chat about our two teams and he seemed like a nice person.
Except knowing the company I was in, this would connect in their brains as
Charby + talking to bloke = she's pulled!
I hate this, I hate the fact that I can't have a bloke mate without some people thinking that I/he is trying to pull.
He seems a genuinely nice person.
But its the same as The Hunter, ITFC Fan and The sheep.
LORD Of The Rings star Elijah Wood made the half-time draw as West Ham thrashed Watford, and professed himself a fan after filming a number of scenes for his new film at Upton Park.

Decked out in the club's new away kit for next season, Wood's admission made the Hammers probably the only club on the planet to possess both a winning habit and a winning Hobbit, and the Irons will be hoping to hold on to both for a while yet.

SHIT!!!! Looks like I picked the wrong team to support! (only joking!) But still - FRODO!!!! *sigh*

Monday, May 03, 2004

It's a nice day (for a change!)
It's bank holiday - I have 3 days off of uni.
I want to be playing on the swings in the park - eating an ice lolly.
I'm sat indoors in front of my computer, writing up lecture notes.
Hehe. I've found the Mothership's car keys and house keys in my pocket.

Sunday, May 02, 2004

*mental note*
if you carelessly dump a towel in the washbag, next to your dirty faggy smelling clothes from a few days ago's adventures, please note that somehow magically, the smell manages to get transferred to your towel.
Now I need to do some damn washing tomorrow, and I was quite happily ignoring the Everest in the corner of my room, I should really do my bedding too, cos i'm sure it's been a month or two since I last did it.
Get back to Derby fairly painlessly and since 5pm I have been dedicatedly writing up notes from mammalian reproduction.
Actually I've written one week's worth of lectures and it has taken me forever!
CL and UDOBF still away and MH at work so I've had nothing to distract, even internet!
Been listening to music while I've been working, funny how certain songs can trigger off memories. Like R Kelly's Ignition Remix will always trigger off Jena and LF staying the week and me pulling that guy at Desperate and Easy.
Crazy In love By Beyonce will remind me of how I came to see him in York and him being sweet and funny and loving.
At the Mo it's Blue's "You make me wanna" I remember listening to that at 1AM one Saturday night, texting LF and finding out that he "liked me more than a friend" and how panicky that made me, how I asked if he was on drugs or drunk and why me when there was nicer looking people and people nearer him in York.
And him telling me he didn't want anyone else, that he wanted me and was afraid that he'd scared me. Even now, hearing that song and Avril Lavinge's I'm with you straight after brings a smile to my face.
I'm glad it happened and I'm glad that we're still mates although I would like to see him more. I haven't seen him since August, when he ended it and I miss the jerk.
Gonna have a bath in a min and chill and hopefully by the time i get out MH will be home and we can play silly buggers.

Saturday, May 01, 2004

I must remember to update more often, otherwise this will become a pointless exercise like all the other journals I have attempted to keep over the years.
Exam Timetable is out and its scary, gotta get my arse in gear now, tomorrow, I'm back in Derby and gotta start revising.
Best Mate At Home is talking about travelling after I finish uni - That would beat going to Sheff. (MH got in - as if she wouldn't though!)
I failed - again! Like I give a Fuck anyway! Who needs to learn to drive!?
Next lesson on Tuesday and we'll try for a cancellation.
We went to the sheff W-Utd reserve game and met Sasa Ilic!! He was loverly and cheered me up by asking what I was doing there and signing my charlton shirt, went out that night to celebrate failing.
Wheee! Discovered that mixing Red, Purple and Green Red Square is actually very yummy!

Anyway. Today We drew with Leicester at footy (relegating them, even though they should have beaten us)
Wednesday lost 3-2 away to Luton after being 2-0 up at half time and I found the words to a song I have loved for ages, it reminds me of everything I felt about LF

The Kinks : Days
Thank you for the days, those endless days, those sacred days you gave me
I'm thinking of the days, I won't forget a single day, believe me
I bless the light, I bless the light that lights on you believe me
And though you're gone, you're with me every single day, believe me
Days I'll remember all my life, days when you can't see wrong from right
You took my life, but then I knew that very soon you'd leave me
But it's all right, now I'm not frightened of this world, believe me
I wish today could be tomorrow, the night is dark, it just brings sorrow, let it wait
Thank you for the days, those endless days, those sacred days you gave me
I'm thinking of the days, I won't forget a single day, believe me
Days I'll remember all my life, days when you can't see wrong from right
You took my life, but then I knew that very soon you'd leave me
But it's all right, now I'm not frightened of this world, believe me
Thank you for the days, those endless days, those sacred days you gave me
I'm thinking of the days, I won't forget a single day, believe me
I bless the light, I bless the light that shines on you, believe me
And though you're gone, you're with me every single day, believe me