Wednesday, August 26, 2015

So lets update as I feel the situation on here is stupid enough to need a full update.

  • The death certificate was wrong. As in the wrong maiden name and date of birth.
  • Before registering the death (a full 6 days after she died and three days after telling mum it wasn't for her to do) they went to the care home and demanded the 200 pounds that she had in her pocket money account there.
  • They arranged the funeral for Sept 14 - 35 days after she died as they all have holidays booked.
  • They want the most expensive coffin as "mum deserved the best" which is a shame that they argued that she didnt need to go into a home, didn't need one to one care after her fall earlier this year where she broke her hip.
  • They want to take the coffin on the Woolwich Ferry. I have no idea of the logistics of this.
  • They had to change the date to Sept 15. They realised that there is no money for a funeral as the care home fees are 60k. 
  • Granddad's will is now - 20 months after his death - being sorted. 
  • They realised they cannot use Granddad's money for the funeral, no one else seems to have money for a funeral.
  • They told Mum that they are not happy with her using Nan's money for the solicitor after the court case. This is even though the solicitor was trying to get the will sorted so it could go to Nan. This is about 5k.
  • They demanded all of Nan's accounts, they clearly didn't believe the court judgement that nothing untoward has gone wrong and also the finances up to Nan's death. I expect there will be some fallout there.
  • Nan and Granddad's house was up for sale briefly at 475k.  I know of one account that had 10k in, another that as of Jan last year had 17k. There may be others. There is life insurance, there is stocks and shares. I think best case scenario is that the estate is worth 600k. There are 6 siblings. Is it worth all this drama and hassle? I'd be well away if I was given 100k. Apparently it is worth the drama.
  •  We still have no idea who has paid the council tax and utilities for Nan and Granddad's old house. My cousin has been squatting in there since Granddad died. Judging by the above do you guys think they'd let him stay there out of goodness of their hearts? Do you think he's accessing money from another account? Its entirely possible!
  • Yesterday I found out that my uncle I has got the police to investigate my uncle M who is a will executor and although not whiter than white in this whole sorry fiasco is the last person I'd expect to be accused of embezzlement. M is a solicitor. His entire career is now in jeopardy. Is throwing your career away worth 600k at most? I can't imagine so. 
I think that's everything guys. I'll update as and when more drama occurs.....

Monday, August 24, 2015

It was my birthday. I turned 32. Nan's funeral is scheduled for the 15th of September as they all have holidays booked. So she sits rotting in a morgue for 36 days. Everyone is fighting over money. I even have vague dreams about what I might get and then feel a little bad.
We had a community fun day at work that I organised, it went well. Welshy is in Serbia and I had a very bad day yesterday.
I have done some small gardening and went to Willowtree. The lady who owns it is selling up so we went for a last look.
Nostalgia. The first place I made friends, Like P and E. A place I have known and felt at home since I was 6. The place that inspired a lifetime of horses, memories of mini-adventures, laughs, sadnesses, horses that I've known and loved, tears and loss and regaining of confidence around horses. I always thought it would be there. I hadn't visited in I don't know how long. 2009? 2010? The place was run down, hardly any horses, hardly any staff. Standards slipped - never ever would we have left an empty haynet in a stablefloor with a horse.
I hit a car at the stables I visit now. I fear it to be an expensive insurance job - apparently both sides of the bumper need replacing not just the side I hit?
They all had a party there and I wasn't invited. I tell myself I don't mind but I'm a little hurt I didn't get invited. My paranoid self tells me its cos no one there likes me. Real me tells me to stop acting like a child and oversights happen.

Monday, August 10, 2015

So Mum went to register the death today.
Only to be told by Uncle D that it was nothing to do with her, that she wasn't to interfer and he would make all the arrangements and to pass over Nan's finances immediately. Oh and the funeral would be at some point in September as "we all have holidays booked".

Mother went hysterical, flew back to Grotty this afternoon. I'm here to pick up the pieces as always. She took my house and car keys with her.
That's a bit of a nuisance really.

Saturday, August 08, 2015

My Nan died today. I think in this blog's entire existence she has been a distant figure, definitely demented and causing all sorts of issues before she went into the care home and I'm finding it hard to remember what she was before.
Amazing Knitter, Good painter, Land Girl, Dog lover, cake maker. What now is called a Health Care Assistant, Someone who comforted me when I was terrified of the Original King Kong film, someone who fed me awful mashed banana sandwiches.
Her and Granddad would take us to Kent and we'd go fishing, butterflying, making jams from brambles.
She lost two children before she had Mother and had a breakdown and in those days that meant a stay in a mental home.
She was probably illegitimate, left school at 14 and worked in a children's home.
6 Children (surviving) one adopted daughter, fostered another child - of which I am named.

Apart from me and Mum not one of the others have been near her in Months. She went a little ill a fortnight ago, Uncle J popped round, stayed for 20 minutes, the others requested to be kept informed by phone if there were any changes.

The nurses checked on her in the night and found her "unresponsive" they called a paramedic. The Paramedic attempted CPR. Mother and the others were called. Mother was there at 5.40. She left at 10. Not one of the others had been there.

Uncle D sent mother a text informing her (As we have no contact with them they have no reason to know she has been in the country) that she is not to interfer with "the body and leave the care home to make the arrangements"

It was a shock, an expected shock, we thought despite the dementia she would go on for years. Their attitude has been appalling and documented again throughout this blog. Will they get guilty? What will happen now? Nan's estate is still not sorted from Granddad's death last year, More waiting and seeing but I'm glad Mum was here at least and not in Lanzarote.