Home alone again.
Last night after the France/Croatia match MH went home with STF, I came home and found the house all empty.
CL and UDOBF came home about half eleven this morning, and went again after an hour or two as they are going to Exeter, after fixing the car that was broken into last night...
MH came home about 2 or 3, she went again about half 7.
I'm home alone and still non the wiser about me and LF.
Was talking to Gay Tom about it, and he thinks it sounds like he just doesn't want to hurt me, that he's sensitive and sweet. (which LF is)
But when I asked GT what that meant, whether it was a mistake or not, he didn't reply.
Today the bad vibes are creeping into my head, telling me all the things that I dont want to hear.
Doesnt help having MH so loved up (says she's over Jena, even if she claims to be over him a little too much for my liking)
I just don't understand.
LF said that one day I'd want the relationship bit, and I want it, I'm just scared of it, should have told him that really.
Oh well, I'm sure I'll get that chance later.
I want Jitsu Freak to come online, want her opinion on it all, she's the only one I can talk to apart from GT.
Suppose I could talk to MH about it all, but I get the feeling that she will be kinda scornful about it all, say that I'm not going to get anywhere cos I'm too shy, too into myself, for me and LF to work, like we didn't make it work last time.
I don't know, part of me knows she is right, part of me wants to challenge that.
But I'm going home to London next week, and I know that that doesn't help a situation.