Sunday, May 28, 2006

So perhaps now I've re-read my weekends posting I owe a little bit of an explaination.
I still reckon I was completely sober all weekend, obviously though, my fingers get a bit drunk, a bit quicker than the rest of me!

So Friday I show up at the aquarium and promptly get invited on a night out. I only possess my work shirt for there, and nice as it is, I can't see it going down well in a pub, especially as its adorned with a large sewn on shark and several badges that I make when I get bored at the craft table.
But luckily K from Swansea, lends me a nice black top and away we go to The Horse Bar somewhere on Westminster Bridge Road.
So yay! We settle down for some serious drinking with other members of the Education Department and The Hallowed Aquarists, responsible for all fishcare and who (bastards that they are) get to hide behind the scenes and never deal with the public (obviously I'm after a position down there, even if would spend all day stinking of fish)
I've not been proper drinking since I met Flash and Spins so I'm well excited. (plus some of the aquarists are very cute!)
Anyway I think I aquitted myself well, nine double archers and lemonades's later and I've outlasted many of the aquarists and a few of the education dept too!
K from Swansea, then decided to show me how she has double jointed shoulder blades, so I demonstrate my famous-hand-that-can-revolve-around-360 degrees trick.
I'm rewarded by a box of purloined matches from the bar.
I demonstrate the trick several times over and my pockets fill up with matchboxes. Then one of the aquarists pinched a box for their fags!
Oh the horror! How dare she?! They're MY presents!
So I instantly fill my pockets up and what to do with the others? Well sticking them down my bra seemed the only sensible place to keep them safe.
Somewhere else along this point, I challenge B from OZtralia in a "show-me-yours-and-i'll-show-you-mine" thing.
Only I claim forfeit cos he had a really hairy chest, which I dislike so I claimed I was too revolted to show mine - incidently aquarists are really boring people! I listened to one discuss his favourite terrapin for 20 minutes and another talk about the problems of feeding the sharks.
So yeah, ho-hum, then I realised that I didnt wanna get trapped in London again and scuttled back of to Waterloo Station, scattering boxes of matches on my way!

Saturday was my mums best mates daughters 16th (follow that?) and we get invited round to a BBQ.
My "excuse" for my behavour was that I was drinking WKD and all the caffine sent me hyper, cos her oldest brothers mate, showed up, with what was possibly the coolest hat I've ever seen since my awesome Wormy Hat!
After Extensive googling, I believe it was this.
Possibly bouncing up to a guy I'd never met, waving a burger at him and promptly stealing his hat might have shall we say, spooked him a bit. He disappeared with the hat and I didnt get to see him again until I had consumed all the WKD and was working my way through a bottle of vodka that I was mixing in a pint glass with orange juice and lemonade.
Looking back perhaps he wasnt eyeing me up, perhaps it was just fear.
Anyway, I launched another attack on the hat, which he tried to hide from me.
Pppfftt I grew up with The Brat, I dug him in the back of the knee and he yelped and let go of the hat, which I ran away with again.
He promptly persued me upstairs into their bathroom, and I tried to offer a fair exhange for the hat, including some of my Aquarium badges, my trainers and my glasses, which I thought was a fair trade.
Trying to hold a door shut by leaning on it isnt something I can do well, especially in just socks, so I was sliding over the floor, they took advantage of this and burst into the bathroom.
I then tried to make an escape out of the bathroom window, only well I'm not sure how but I kinda dented the hat getting stuck, whilst hanging out the window.
Shortly after this my Mother decided it was time we left.

3 comments:

HistoryGeek said...

Wow, that was quite the weekend!

Flash said...

Good work, missy!

weenie said...

Good to read about your drinking exploits again...dare I say that you drink like a fish? ;)