Baah. I hate London.
I managed - miracles of miracles to get to St Pancras on my new route and to take MH to where she wanted to go.
And then the morning was my own!
So what did I do with it?
I started by strolling down Oxford Street. How I hate the crowds getting in my way and my fucking god, there was tourists taking pictures of fucking Debinhams! Do you not have shopes in other countrys?
I can imagine it now.
"Oooh Look Doris, this is one of those London things. A shop"
"Oooh Mavis. Did you go in?!"
"No I wasn't sure of the protocol in these places, but I have a nice picture of the shop window.!"
I mean honestly what the fuck do you want a picture of a shop window for? And a busker? And a tube carriage?
Freaky fucks.
So I walked all the way down Oxford Street and then went into HMV where I sat reading a book on Bill Hicks for two hours (Ha! Take that fuckfaces! I READ a book in HMV instead of browsing for DVD's or CD's.!)~
How I hate fucking tourists, they toddle along at .5 centimetres an hour an walk 5 abreast so its impossible to overtake and you have to slow down for them and then they stop suddenly and you collide into the back of them when they stop to answer their mobiles or look a maps or take 90 degree turns into shops and then have the cheek to tut at you when you cant stop in tim and collide into them.
I then found MH and we went to Pizza Hut in Leicester Square for tea, (again I got us there without getting lost - I'm great me!)
And then I found our way to the pub me and Flash Found our way to outside of Euston on our adventure and we stat and srank.
And that's why speellling is a little poopoo.
Hurrah for being on the nice side of Lopndon!
11 comments:
I take it you haven't tried to walk through Woolwich at any time in the past decade, then ;-)
At least Woolwich doesnt have tourists clogging the place up and taking pictures of the pound shops.
That makes it better than Oxford Street automatically.
I hardly notice the dodgey chinese people selling dodgey DVD's either nowadays!
After that speelllling I was so glad to find that your hammered, Nice!
Yes, we get the slow tourist problem here in NY too. I try not to get too mad about it, though, because any time I travel, I know I become one of them!
:)
*Taking hurried notes about being a tourist in London...*
Right so I should only walk very slowly, and I should take pictures of all the shops (I think especially the ones that are American chains, would be a nice bit), and maybe I'll stop someone sufficiently harried looking to take a picture with a "real" Londoner!
When I lived in DC, we had an e-mail that circulated about what to tell tourists about what to see and do in DC. My favorite was that should they ever see the lights on the platform on the Metro flashing, that they should exit the station immediately as it signalled an impending earthquake (you get of course that a) it really signals the arrival of a train & b)there are no earthquakes in DC).
We don't get any of that in Crapsville & if we did I'd stop them & tell them that there are several squillion better places to see in the UK.
Oooo tha's royeet. Tha be meeeeee takin' them thor picturiactions for moiy fam'ly baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack 'ome in tha cuntry.
OOOARRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
...Backward Nottinghamshire folk....
They might have caves and a gay man in green and a castle but they are lacking in sheep shagging statues, like the good, more developed Derby folk.
Does this mean I can't tell you how cute your accent is? Or ask directions to a "real pub" or how to meet the queen?
Doesn't matter. You probably couldn't understand me. Had a ladyon the phone from Canada the other day who asked me to email her my question because my accent was so thick. (I didn't think I had one. I live in the midwest.)
Alecya, my accent has become bastardised after spending time in the midlands so its doubtful its cute!
I can take you to a real pub but I wouldn't be able to get you to Buck House. I've been there but wouldn't know off the top of my head what tube stop or anything!
And by the way. Welcome and come and comment again!
I was just teasing.
Glad to chat you up a bit, I've been lurking for a while.
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