Yes. Here you can buy Barca crisps. Or even Real Madrid crisps if thats more your thing.

There's a new giant sweety shop thats opened up here over the xmas break. Still not sure i'm down with sweet shops selling pickles, onions and olives. Doesn't seem quite right.

Urk. Talking over last nights events and wondering why I stink so much of smoke, I realise that I drank a hefty amount of wine last night.

Not bad for someone who hates it normally.

Its 1am, me and welshy have just performed "Head, shoulders, knees and toes" on a table in front of a baying audience.

The town is full of fire. I can see at least 7 from where I am. We have returned from our invited party where we ate chops, TDR risked Pig Cheek. (horrible looking, greeny and reminded me of a cross between bacon and intestine).
My glasses got smashed by a misplaced football pass.
A man kept leaping through the BIGGEST fire shouting "Viva San Anton! Viva San Adrian!"

(Apparently he is the patron saint of animals)

Anyway, we left that about midnight. Walking by Ogipan Welshy gets hailed by a student. We join his party Welshy is told that "You speak English well. Not very Well, but well."

The man who's party this is, is trying to ride a fold up bike on one of those giant cotton reel type things, the kinda that you get in factories with cable on.
He earlier was trying to walk along it and nearly got run over. His girlfriend tried it and fell, hitting her head with a crack. She seems ok. 
Me and Welshy are curious as to whether we are the responsible adults in this party. 
Its fun shit like this that makes me love Spain and love this crazy ass town we live in. Surely nothing this fun can happen in a city like Madrid or Barca?
Its time to do some dancing I think.....

I am probably the only retarded person who is capable of walking into a fucking huge fuck off sign on a motorway. We were walking along the Road of Death to Calahorra, and I was looking down at my shoes, wondering if I should stop now to take a stone out, or should I wait a little longer till I was across the roundabout.

Looked up a little too late.... BANG..

Fucking OUCH!

TDR was full of concern. Welshy has seen too many stupid accidents of mine to be concerned and merely fell over laughing. I had a lump, a small cut and my nose hurt like shit.
I got across the road, laughing at my stupidity and then shot a lot of shit out of my nose. Certainly cleared me out!

Anyway, we had a little potter and dinner and then a walk amongst the old town in Calahorra.

Today I was cordially invited to "Fire Day". by one of the locals on Sunday. He announced that there will be much drink and much food.

I fear the fire I saw the other day was a prelude to this and I shall be burnt at the stake and eaten while the locals let their tails out of their trousers and dance about with pitchforks.

"Come to Spain Charby, its hot here."

Today its a whopping 2 degrees. In England its currently a heady 5....

After a day chilling out, I took TDR on a tour of the town today while Welshy got on with my Stats thats due in tomorrow.

We wandered about the town, took all of 5 minutes. I took him to see the school, I took him about the fields and we met Grey Pony.

Now, bored I decided to go to Ogipan and get a barra for our tea.
Walk down the street and there are men building a fuck off giant fire in the street and preparing some kinda barbeque. Its so dry here, I'm not sure fires are a good sign. If you hear of a town burning down in the news, that'll be San Adrian.

Either that or they're planning a ritual sacrifice of the infidel outsiders....

This is Spanish Christmas. Well they have recently started celebrating the 25th December as well (the kids tell me that they can have up to three presents depending on how their families choose to celebrate, Xmas eve, Xmas Day and Dia de reyes. [day of the kings]). This is to signify the day that the kings arrived at the manager to meet Baby Jesus.
It also happened to be the day me, Welshy and TDR (who is here to help while my bosses are collecting their baby in Vietnam) arrived back in Spain.
We didn't have any food in our cupboards, so went to Eroski to collect food. Bad times. Eroski was shut. So onwards to Ogipan, now even on fiesta days Ogipan bakery is open as it also doubles as a bar. Not today however.
So we went home and made a makeshift meal out of sweetcorn and mint matchmakers.

So. Traditional New Year round up.

High points of this year? Promotion at the Museum, Getting Olympic tickets (208 days to go!) my holidays to the Lake district and Vegas, leaving the Museum at last and moving to Spain.

I remember at the start of the year somehow knowing that this year would be different, that I wouldn't end it how it started and this has proved to be correct.

My Bucket list to achieve before I am 30, is reaching another target ticked with my slow, unsteady progress in Spanish. Welshy is more fluent than me, but I have been lazy practising. We're hoping to take the equivalent of a GCSE in May.

Our contract in Spain ends in June. I'm not sure what to do next. I kinda like the idea of staying in Spain for another year. Maybe not where we are now, I love the eccentricities of our town but 14 hours to get home is a bit much and its impossible for visitors to come.

If I am to progress onto year 2 of my course I need to try and get a new job, either in England or in Spain. To have at least that first k saved for the fees. I need to get CELTA qualified in order to help my job prospects if I go to Spain. There goes another grand.

But June is a long time away so there is plenty of time to decide whats best then.

Bad points to 2011? I'm not sure really. Nothing that affects me personally too much, of course The Crisis as those in Spain refers to the Economy. The Riots certainly weren't pleasant but nothing to bother me really.

No. I think 2011 is the first time in a long time where I can't think of any real bad point to the year.

So I won't tell it to Fuck Off. I'll wish it a pleasant farewell and now look eagerly forward to 2012.

I had a class today full of boys that love football, their grammar is pretty good but they lack any vocab, they clearly dont care about education at all and happily tell Welshy that they are being forced to repeat years and have been banned from x, y and Z classes.

Anyway we get on Ok-ish with them. For some reason today they all wanted to discuss their muscles and this involved me desperately trying to keep them on track as they wanted to arm wrestle.
Anyone one of them made a pretty unmistakable gesture and the other laughed in that kinda teenage boy way, and said that was why he had arm muscles.
So I whacked in "Wank" into Google translate and asked him if that was the reason.

Apparently he was miming going to the Gym.....

So got up early only to find that my early morning class didnt arrive.
I promised my noisy class that they could try peanut butter and marmite sandwiches this week as part of our food topic.
For the next hour, it resulted in kids running down the corridor to spit out their sandwiches into the toilet.

In our Spanish lesson today, we went and learnt how to play a popular card game with pesatas. Never seen a pesata before FYI.

Basic rules of the game is that you have 4 cards, can swap them once, then have 3 rounds of betting, for high card, low card and pairs. Then you bet on the nearest to 31 and then someone work out who won.
Spanish cards are funny looking. Like tarot cards.

We went out to watch Madrid V Barcelona. The score flattered Madrid.
We stayed out. I got drunk. I fell over in front of some of Welshys students.

This place really needs a decent take away to fulfill my salt craving. We ended up going to the only takeaway in the town where the man serving refused to believe that we were teachers and not working in one of the factories. 

I got a kebab, I asked for it plain, unfortunately plain here seems to mean drowning in salad cream. Gross. I took it home and rinsed every indivdual piece in the water and then felt violently ill for the rest of the night.

They eat thistles here in Spain. Gross.

Public holiday part two this week.

Welshy has a two hour lesson as one of his students is preparing for the FCE exam in English.

Me? No work. I'm slowly getting hammered on Tinto de verano and listening to Cliff Richard.

Yay.

Oh god, somehow I've brought tripe sausages....

Today - Tuesday and Thursday are public holidays here in Spain. No one can tell you what they are though. Saturday was a Saint's day. Today is the Immaculate Conception day? Thursday may be another Saint's day.
Who knows?
Anyway admitting defeat in the attempt to make pupils come on the holidays we just has lessons for the adults today.
Idiot boss arranged for us to meet him at 10.30 for a start at 11am.
10.15, our landlady comes to tell us that the lesson started at 10am.
*sigh*

Anyway it recovered OK and we ended up in one of the local bars ordering food, I tried pincha's which are bar snacks that you pay for unlike the free tapas.

Bad move. One was a battered calamari ring. The other was a battered hard boiled egg. With some kinda mayonnaise in it. The calamari was ok, the egg - revolting!

El Gordo

People here in Spain go crazy for this lottery. It means the Fat. (I think) When I was in Barcelona, people were in huge queues to pay for tickets. Welshy reported that people have admitted to spending thousands on tickets.
Even those who are unemployed.
Will in Barcelona also says that he has seen people paying for their lottery tickets with scrap metal.

So.

how much do you think the grand prize is? Bearing in mind all this mania, that tickets cost about a fiver?

4million.

Yeah. Alright 4 million isn't to be sniffed at, but I believe thats the same amount that you get on a Saturday night lotto jackpot at home?

Carmen is a spoilt brat of about 15/16, She thinks she is a big person in the town as her father owns the car dealership. If she is not happy with something she will phone her Mother to get her to complain.
She took today to mocking my accent, both in Spanish and in English, and said something clearly insulting about me in Spic.

I lost my temper.

"Carmen, you are the rudest, most unintelligent girl I have ever met."
"Que? What is rude?"
Javier looked it up in the dictionary. I thought she was going to faint.
"Miss Karran.... You... You insult me!"
"Yes Carmen, just like you insulted me, just now in Spanish. The way you insult my Spanish. You insult me by mocking my way of talking. You insult me by not doing your work or listening to what you have been told. You insult me by wasting my time."

From the look on her face no one has ever spoken to her in that way and she meekly got on with her work in silence.

Still alive I see?
Here I am to tell you about my trip to Vegas.
My Christ what a tiring place it is. A week, I found far too long. Welshy wanted to return home after 4 days. A friend just kept saying about wanting to go home and do the ironing.
Too many lights. Too much attacking your senses. Too much happening.
I liked the colours and lights. Cant get sick of those. Got attacked by Gamblor when it came to virtual Craps. And I played Roulette - a tenner on black. Didnt come through. Learnt how to play poker and won 80 dollars which pleased me.
I spent the money on cute underwear from Victoria's Secret. I like how they think I'm a D cup there.
We hired a muscle car, a chevy comarao and drove to the Hoover dam, We took a plane ride to the Grand Canyon. (how is it that all I can use to describe it sounds cliched? Its amazing. Awe-inspiring. etc.)
I rode a mustang western style-y along and saw a coyote.
We ate buffets at the Bellagio and Monte Carlo and ate sea food at Hurrah's. I challenged a friend and won a mechanical bull ride.
Me and Welshy fell out.
I got drunk and accosted a US Marine who looked far too young to be wearing the medals that he was "Did you get that one for colouring in? And knowing your 2x table?"
"No M'am. I got those for service in Iraq and Afghanistan."
My bad.
I brought amazing socks and lost all track of time and place in The Venetian and Caesar's place. 
I ate carrotcake cheesecake.
Me and Welshy dodged a bullet and didn't get married.
A strange Mexican stole my friends coat and then got drunk and passed out, the security at Monte Carlo put him to sleep in my friends bed. My friend and said Security guard beat the Mexican up when the mistake was realised.
I ate shitloads of macdonalds and discovered Denny's and decided I hate the way you have to add the tax on separately. I dont know how much tax is and if it changes for whatever you buy.
I hated tipping everyone. You've not provided me with superb service, why should I give you extra?
I watched the New England Patriots in Hooters (Big let down FYI)
I still think American Football is a stupid sport.

I did not sleep at all on the plane home convinced that if I did it would fall out of the sky.

Now I am back in sleepy Spanish Bumpkinville and its only 3 weeks till Xmas.

Hello all.

Still alive I see?

Here I am to tell you about my trip to Vegas.

My Christ what a tiring place it is. A week, I found far too long. Welshy wanted to return home after 4 days. A friend just kept saying about wanting to go home and do the ironing.

Too many lights. Too much attacking your senses. Too much happening.

I liked the colours and lights. Cant get sick of those. Got attacked by Gamblor when it came to virtual Craps. And I played Roulette - a tenner on black. Didnt come through. Learnt how to play poker and won 80 dollars which pleased me.

I spent the money on cute underwear from Victoria's Secret. I like how they think I'm a D cup there.

We hired a muscle car, a chevy comarao and drove to the Hoover dam, We took a plane ride to the Grand Canyon. (how is it that all I can use to describe it sounds cliched? Its amazing. Awe-inspiring. etc.)

I rode a mustang western style-y along and saw a coyote.

We ate buffets at the Bellagio and Monte Carlo and ate sea food at Hurrah's. I challenged a friend and won a mechanical bull ride.

Me and Welshy fell out twice.

I got drunk and accosted a US Marine who looked far too young to be wearing the medals that he was "Did you get that one for colouring in? And knowing your 2x table?"

"No M'am. I got those for service in Iraq and Afghanistan."

My bad.

I brought amazing socks and lost all track of time and place in The Venetian and Caesar's place. Me and Welshy dodged a bullet and didn't get married.

A strange Mexican stole my friends coat and then got drunk and passed out, the security at Monte Carlo put him to sleep in my friends bed. My friend and said Security guard beat the Mexican up when the mistake was realised.

I ate shitloads of macdonalds and discovered Denny's and decided I hate the way you have to add the tax on separately. I dont know how much tax is and if it changes for whatever you buy.

I hated tipping everyone. You've not provided me with superb service, why should I give you extra?

I watched the New England Patriots in Hooters (Big let down FYI)

I still think American Football is a stupid sport.

I did not sleep at all on the plane home convinced that if I did it would fall out of the sky.

Now I am back in sleepy Spanish Bumpkinville and its only 3 weeks till Xmas.

One of the things we have been accused of often by our mental bosses is that we don't have a bond with the kids, despite them telling us that kids are excited to see us, that they look forward to our lessons. That they run shrieking to us in the streets.
Today, further proof. One of my toddlers came to class with holiday photos. Photos that only I was allowed to see, not my boss.
Hmmm. 

Anyway we have been paid and we are now RICH!

There's an impromptu brass band concert walking down the road and hanging out outside a local bar here.
I swear I'll never get used to the mentalness of this town.

This Halloween has been rather bizarre. Despite explaining for weeks before hand that Halloween isn't a big deal for either me orWelshy we've still been told off for not being fully into it. We were told that the day would be easy and fun for the kids but then we got bitched at for making crosswords and word searches for the kids.
Accused of not caring (again), of not planning.
Hardly any kids came anyway. They were too busy being hyped up on sugar and racing about collecting sweets.
Alejandra, one of the kids bounded up to us after class when we were going to Eroski.
"MMRRRRRRRRRR EEEEEEEEEEEFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!! MMMMMISSSSSSSSSSS KAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRANN! 

she gabbled to us about the sweets that she had and then fled off to collect more sweets.

So most of the shops and schools were closed yesterday because of Halloween.
Today was another public holiday. All Saint's day. Like in Mexico, the Day of the Dead, everyone goes to cemetries and visit dead relatives.
So another quiet day in the school. We are looking forward to payday, we have been existing on about 15 euros since last Thursday. Am bored of just eating pasta.

Its got cold. Still a reasonable 14 degrees though, although only having tshirts and no jacket make it noticable.
I rescued Welshy from a sparrow that somehow flew into our flat. Next Morning we were woken by a sparrow hopping on the roof window and cheekily looking in.
Lessons have been a bit hit and miss, had a few disagreements on the best way to handle my toddler classes.
The kids are very excited about Halloween on Monday so am just gonna plan some easy lessons around that.
Tuesday is another fiesta day so that'll be a piece of piss as well.
Oh. And as from today, I'm going back to England in two weeks or 8 workdays, which means its nearly time to go to VEGAS!! Whooop whooop!
Another joyful note is that two different ladies from our classes are out scouting places for me to ride. One offered me a ride on one of her husbands horses.
Feel a bit rude to phone her up and discuss but maybe when I see her Tuesday we can make a real plan.
Poor Welshy has a cold and is all manky.

****End of story****End of story****

In my 7.30 lesson I set up a skype "mystery guest" Which excited the kids no end. They established that the person was in the UK, which then led to questions about time difference. 
Student 1 "What time is it in England?"
Me. "Well England is an hour behind us, it is 8 here. So it is 7 in the UK."
Student 2 "What in the morning?"

Welshy also had a child jump out of a window today rather than stay in his lesson (I feel I should point out, that it was because they wanted to rescue a pen that Ed chucked out the window).

I had a bad lesson yesterday, one that resulted in my weeping like a girl at the end of it, with sheer frustration that the adults hadnt understood what I was saying.

But at least I wasnt Welshy, who played a youtube video of the three little pigs to a class of 6 year olds whhich ended with Santa Claus being boiled alive

Today has been a Fiesta, a bank holiday. In Zaragoza it has been a week long thing but today is the birthday of the Virgin's pet goat or something so its a national holiday in Spain.
People were out partying late last night. The Accordian people, who I have learnt are old fashioned alarm clocks, standing on the street corner and singing and playing, were out at 6am.
And us? Well we had lessons as usual. Despite hardly any of the kids showing up and one of the Bosses taking it as holiday. We had one child for the first hour instead of 12 and then we combined the next two classes into one and played Karaoke with youtube.
I took the next class (The Harpies) And Welshy's class didnt come.
I planned to show The Harpies some fairytales, Jack and the Beanstalk etc, and then get them to write and draw me a story each. Not too taxing, fun as its fiesta day.
Right?
Wrong.
They watched the video. Then I explained what we were doing. They then proceeded to shout "NO" at me, and then Harpy No.1 told me she needed to go to the toilet. So I let her. She returned with one of The Bosses who proceeded to talk to them in Spanish for 20 minutes explaining what I wanted to do.
I was really annoyed, controlled it until after the lesson and then pointed out that I didnt think that the way he acted was very helpful to me. Now they know that they dont have to bother listening in English, they can run to him and complain that what I am saying is too hard, before I even have a chance to rephrase what I am saying.
Whether he takes that on board or not is another matter...

Anyway I had a class after that, Welshy's didnt show, these kids are very sweet and 5-6 so we played Disney Karaoke and then I had another class of 10 year olds of which 2 showed up and we did the same.

All in all a fairly easy day, although it seemed kinda pointless to be opened. It gave me hope that when we are forced to open on Saturday after we return from Vegas, that will be the same and no one will want to attend.

Today Welshy has been subjected to our bosses explaining exactly why we're bad teachers.
Apparently its our fault that The Harpies complain that our lesson is too easy and too hard to understand at the same time. Its wrong of us to comment that we dislike a child, despite this being said in the privacy of their own home, rather than in the school like M does.
Our planning is not thorough enough. Despite the fact that often we are told to make up lessons on the spot, because they pander to the needs of the children. I clearly show a lack of interest in what I am doing.

This is all very well and good, and if it was constructive in anyway fair enough. BUT. Like I said, they often tell us to abandon what we have planned on the spot and to do something else. If they have a test in something with school, why not tell us a few days before so we can plan?
If this is ENGLISH class why are you coming in and talking to them in Spanish for 20 minutes? Making it clear that we have no authority in the class and they can go running to the bosses every time things get a little hard?

I'm starting to think that I do not want to stay here any longer than my contract. Which is a shame, I like Spain, I like the kids, my timetable works in my favour to do time studying for my MSc. I like being in the country, I like not being in England and not at the NMM. But I think maybe Welshy is right and we should look for work elsewhere once our contract ends.

(The funny thing in all this is that M does not have the balls to talk to me about the problems in my teaching. He is scared of me, ever since I confronted him on the phone and called him weak and pathetic. It is funny because he clearly does not have a clue about teaching the Nursery kids. I even had to point out to him that teaching an 18month to write is a bit beyond anybody.)

~We went to a dinner part y run by our bosses last night. I tried some spicy tortilla stuff and some spanish spicy meats. During the conversation it was mentioned that one of my runts is now asking for coffee with yellow, as it sounds very similar to the spanish for coffee with ice.

I like that.

Today, like most Sundays here. I have baked a cake, done some clothes washing, washed up from last night and am thinking without much joy about the prospect of having to mop the floor and dust.
Fuck this, hand me a pinny, I'm gonna whack out the gramaphone and put on some of the best wartime hits! Where's me "Best of '45"?

We've been to Calahorra again, walking along the Road Of Fear. (Would you walk 3km along the hard shoulder of an "a" road? No. Sensible people don't do such antics. So why am I doing this?
Because the bus to the city stops at 12.30 and starts again at 3.45.)
We walked this time to the big supermarket, which does some exciting things that you cannot buy in San Adrian. Like teabags. Actual Twinnings Earl Grey tea, which I am assured is better than the Eroski Basic teabag that Welshyis currently working through.
And. In my humble opinion. It is well worth paying 4 quid for a tiny pot of peanut butter. God how I've missed peanut butter. And how glad I am every day that I smuggled out my Marmite.
We also shopped in the "World cuisine" section and purchased some more pickled onions. Whooop!

There is a pet shop also in the Big Supermarket. I lusted after a Senegal parrot who came to the bars and nibbled my fingers and threw some shredded newspaper at me.
I had a conversation with a Mynah bird with twisted feet and wanted to rescue him and take him home.
And Welshy fell in love with a black and white cocker spaniel puppy. Bizarre from someone who hates dogs. I did not like my role reversal of pointing out why we couldn't get the puppy. The costs involved. The commitment. The fact that we do not know if we can have pets here or how we'd get it to England if we have to go home. Especially as we'd be going back to Mothers and she has put her foot down over puppies in the past. Plus buying puppies from a pet shop is wrong.
But my resolve is weak....
No. A bird is better, a bird is less commitment. A bird is easy to care for, a bird can move into my aviary once we go home.
Except said birdies here are rather expensive. I could pick up a cockatiel at home for about 15-20 quid. There? 80 Euro. Just a slight mark up.
Senegal parrot friend? nearly 800 quid. Didn't dare ask about the Mynah bird.
No. As much as I miss animal company, its best for all if we are strong and do not purchase.

Last night me and Welshy comsumed two bottles of "summer wine" = Red wine and lemon fanta.
Come 1am we needed more alcohol so we hit the streets and headed for adventure.
We made friends! Some random drunk cousins. Some random camp guy, who showed us off to the barlady in the Agora, who previously laughed at my attempts to order hot chocolate and I had two men (both obviously very gay) take me to a toilet, where we discussed Madonna.
"You speak English! Like Madonna!" etc.

at 4 the bar stopped serving until a policeman came and took someone away - lack of Spanish meant I had no idea why.
We left at 5.45 and it was still jumping.

Went to bed, woke up at 7am to watch the Wales Rugby game. Then slept till 2pm, then got up and listened to the CAFC radio coverage. Then slept again.

Ready for adventure now although Welshy who didnt sleep is starting to flag. Also I think we made a vague drunken promise to return to the bar between 1-2am to meet one of those guys sisters who spoke English.

Not sure we're gonna go though. Feeling a bit poor.

Last Night welshy was closing the window when he cried with panic...

"What is that? Its a monster! Its a gecko or something!" And then retreated to the safety of the kitchen.
It was indeed a gecko hanging out on our windowsill. A tiny half-an-inch long baby gecko. 
"Kil it!" He demanded. "Before it gets in th house!"
I was so busy laughing I failed to get a decent picture of the baby and then ushered it away with a piece of paper.

Apparently it takes 4 trees and 3 hours to open up a bank account here in Spain. The amount of paperwork we had to sign!
It was ridiculous!
I'm sure the last time I opened an account in England I was in and out of the bank in 30 minutes after having filled one form out! Now I only have 10 minutes before I need to scamper to "Lazer" Hopefully we will get paid soon. Am starting to feel a little bit like Old Mother Hubbard!

How on Earth am I expected to run a proper lesson when my boss sticks his oar in, panders to little children and tells me to abandon my lesson plan and make shit up on the spot so they get to do what they want?

As well as our range of children and teenagers on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays we have an evening class or "conversation club" with adult learners. I took my first class last Thursday and I found it quite traumatic, I had to bluff my way through some grammar. They are all far more demanding on your time than the kids obviously and I found it hard to strike the right balance. 
I have just come back from an early morning lesson with the boss of "Lazer" a metal cutting company which has branches all over Spain. I am not sure if he manages it all or whether just the San Adrian branch.
So I was a bit nervous, especially after last weeks adults. It went ok however. He seems a really nice guy but he likes the sound of his own voice and it is hard to get him to be quiet and listen to you. He told me of a place nearby that has dinosaur fossil footprints so hopefully when we get paid (which should be sometime this week) we can go and visit.
Tomorrow I am to go to Lazer, after we have set up our bank accounts and meet some more top guys there and do some English with them.

Many people will be suffering today. Last night was the anniversary of one of the Bars opening.
So it was partytime until 1am when we went to bed. Woke up at 3 to realise someone had an accordian and there was bad spanish singing going on.
At 8am I woke again and they were still singing along.
I fear some people will have terrible headaches this morning.

Can never again be called clumsy after welshy manaqed to break two glasses in 20 minutes while we were arranging a late night covert mission to empty our bins.
Worst thing was that one of the glasses contained all my Lemon Fanta/Red Wine combo and now the floor is disgustingly sticky.

Todays main adventures in the rock and roll town that is San Adrian, has been an Art contest. Amateur artists have had easels up all over town and now they have gathered them all outside to await the judges verdict.

There is a tattoo parlour that only seems to open when children need to be enticed with Sweeties....

Today we learnt that it is bad to take your rubbish out before 10pm at night. In case it attracts flies and starts to smell. Explains all the filthy looks we get walking down the road carrying our refuse.

Yay! CAFC Win! I discover baking powder making a successful Victoria Sponge Mk2. (looks like a brick, sponge still doesnt taste like English Sponge) and I'm watching Strictly Come Dancing.

More children shout "Hello" at Welshy than me. This makes me very, very sad.
Why does nobody love me?