Saturday, October 16, 2010

Home alone, Welshy is out at his friends. I was invited but I dont really fancy sitting there watching him play Pro Evo online or Poker.
BORING!

The winter is rocking on, Charlton played so, so badly today and we lost 4-0. I cant see us scrambling out of this shit-poor league we are in this season either. Which as E put it may not be a bad thing, at least it means we wont end up heart-broken again after failing to make the playoff final like last year.

Welshy has a telephone interview on Monday to go do a TEFL course in Barcelona. His friend has already been accepted on it. I want to do it too, but not yet. I have to wait and see about this Primary School teaching lark first. Only once I get my rejection in December can I then play.

If he gets through, he will be out there at least a month. I want adventure too. Not to Spain though. I went to Barcalona once. We went on a tour of the football ground, walked down Las Ramblas and I learnt how to order Macdonalds in Spanish.

He only wants to TEFL it up in Europe. Pah to that I cry! Lets go far, far, far away! Lets go to South America! Specifically Costa Rica. Everything I read about it sounds amazing. The wildlife. Beaches. Rainforest. I can sing endlessly "Do You Know The Way to San Jose?"
Plus if you're going to do these things, lets go do it properly!

I worry that Welshy will not come back if he is accepted. Welshy does not want to live in the UK. He scorns the things I love about England.
I love the mental weather, I love knowing the animals and plants that I pass on the way, I love football. I love the history.

I want very much to spend a year abroad having an adventure and then I want to come home.
I dont know if Welshy will want to. I do not know if he will come back or stay out there once he has done his course. I cannot make any crazy decisions until I know whether I am accepted into uni or not. I have also gone for a promotion at work. I would earn more money for which to save for uni if I can get the job and stay at the museum in the meantime.

ITS ALL SO TRICKY!!!!! WHY ARE THESE THINGS HAPPENING AT ONCE!?

The best thing, I feel for me to do, is to stay here. If I am accepted, to earn as much as I can at the Museum before I start uni in September. If it all goes tits up and I cannot get into uni, as I suspect I will not, then I can go.
I have no fear that if he goes out and stays out, it will be a downer on our relationship. I just dont want him to go and have adventures without me! But he's too impatient! Grrrr!!!!!! Naughty Welshy!

I am off next weekend to visit CL and see her baby get Christened. MH will be there. I kinda fear seeing her and how I will react. Whether she will say anything. Its been two years since we fell out and I spelled out in no uncertain terms how I felt about her behaviour. She is now 7 months pregnant with her "sperm donor" baby. I am a grown-up (unfortunately) However much I would like to push her down a flight of stairs I shall be on my bestest behaviour!

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