Apparently before my Mother went on holiday yesterday my brother convinced her that the rent money I'd left on the side for her was actually his rent money for her. Despite him having not given her rent for about 4 months of this year, she believed him not me.
I live with such lovely people!!!
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Monday, July 29, 2013
Welshy is away again in Hamburg this time. Just the week, so will be home soon. One week. Then our holiday and he will be away for 6 weeks.
Mother is going "Home" tomorrow so that's her gone for a month. Leaving me with just the brat to deal with.
This time last year I'd been to see the dressage at the Olympics. Such a good day despite the misery of lack of jobness.
Mother is going "Home" tomorrow so that's her gone for a month. Leaving me with just the brat to deal with.
This time last year I'd been to see the dressage at the Olympics. Such a good day despite the misery of lack of jobness.
Sunday, July 28, 2013
So it seems my mother wants to throw me out. That is an exaggeration, I'm not going anywhere in a hurry but yeah, she hinted at the other day that I should look for a council place (I don't qualify because of the year in Spain [although I can blag that one. Maybe?] and living in the Isle of Dogs in the last 5 years.)
She was talking about it again with Welshy yesterday apparently and yeah, she wants us all out so she can rent the house out and move to Lanzarote and live on the proceeds.
I don't know why but this makes me feel more rejected than anything else she has done. All those times I fretted about moving away or going on holiday because of the guilt trips she put on me about leaving her alone.
All the New Years Eve's I've spent at home watching tv alone after she goes to bed because she's not wanted to be alone.
All those times I've come home early or not gone on a night out because she's complained about being alone.
The times I've cried over being made to feel like an awful, ungrateful spoiled child and now I feel she wants me out. Wants me gone.
Incidentally I also learned that her password to everything on the computer is Brat's real name and DOB. Urgh.
She can't go anywhere until Granddad is in a home at least so I have some leeway. But now getting a real job that pays real money is more urgent than ever. She doesn't want me. She never has. I've never wanted to be here. Just sat it out as I can't afford to live anywhere and I've felt bad.
Not any more. Fuck her.
I went out with H2 and her kids to the Science Museum yesterday. Was awesome to see her, to play on the toys and her kids rather randomly seem to like me, despite only seeing me once a year!
Hacked Wonderhorse out today which went really well. No attempts to smush me against the road surface so that's always a win.
I love riding her and her happy whinny to see me, I love the yard. Friday we ended up sitting, drinking wine and eating pizza until late and next weekend there is a barbeque.
Lovely.
She was talking about it again with Welshy yesterday apparently and yeah, she wants us all out so she can rent the house out and move to Lanzarote and live on the proceeds.
I don't know why but this makes me feel more rejected than anything else she has done. All those times I fretted about moving away or going on holiday because of the guilt trips she put on me about leaving her alone.
All the New Years Eve's I've spent at home watching tv alone after she goes to bed because she's not wanted to be alone.
All those times I've come home early or not gone on a night out because she's complained about being alone.
The times I've cried over being made to feel like an awful, ungrateful spoiled child and now I feel she wants me out. Wants me gone.
Incidentally I also learned that her password to everything on the computer is Brat's real name and DOB. Urgh.
She can't go anywhere until Granddad is in a home at least so I have some leeway. But now getting a real job that pays real money is more urgent than ever. She doesn't want me. She never has. I've never wanted to be here. Just sat it out as I can't afford to live anywhere and I've felt bad.
Not any more. Fuck her.
I went out with H2 and her kids to the Science Museum yesterday. Was awesome to see her, to play on the toys and her kids rather randomly seem to like me, despite only seeing me once a year!
Hacked Wonderhorse out today which went really well. No attempts to smush me against the road surface so that's always a win.
I love riding her and her happy whinny to see me, I love the yard. Friday we ended up sitting, drinking wine and eating pizza until late and next weekend there is a barbeque.
Lovely.
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Urgh. Work has hired some new person to do half of our job. For 1 pound an hour more than we get. Which does work out at a couple of k at the end of the year.
Did enjoy the conversation about how it'd be hard to hire someone for that low..........
I need to get out. Too many shouty candidates and struggling to get stuff done with more and more pressure all the time.
Especially when you know you can get at least 4k a year more doing the same thing elsewhere.
Speaking of which I turned down a possible interview today doing my role for 20k a year. It was in Battersea so a 3hr commute on top of my working day.
No Ta.
I felt a bit bad about turning it down but No. No thanks.
I have done well though, I gotta keep telling myself that. 9 interviews since May and I've turned down two others because of location. That's loads better than this time last year.
Off to Croatia for my birthday. Pretty excited about that. And H2 and the kids are down this weekend. Not last as I confusingly thought.
Pony is going great. We're getting some contact together (albeit losing it almost immediately) and ventured over some jumps and did canter poles - which was ridiculously hard considering I do trot poles all the time!
Did enjoy the conversation about how it'd be hard to hire someone for that low..........
I need to get out. Too many shouty candidates and struggling to get stuff done with more and more pressure all the time.
Especially when you know you can get at least 4k a year more doing the same thing elsewhere.
Speaking of which I turned down a possible interview today doing my role for 20k a year. It was in Battersea so a 3hr commute on top of my working day.
No Ta.
I felt a bit bad about turning it down but No. No thanks.
I have done well though, I gotta keep telling myself that. 9 interviews since May and I've turned down two others because of location. That's loads better than this time last year.
Off to Croatia for my birthday. Pretty excited about that. And H2 and the kids are down this weekend. Not last as I confusingly thought.
Pony is going great. We're getting some contact together (albeit losing it almost immediately) and ventured over some jumps and did canter poles - which was ridiculously hard considering I do trot poles all the time!
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
So unsurprisingly I didn't get that job. I also didnt get the other one I was going for, which disappointed me slightly. 16k a year for a 4 day week? And I smashed their online test.
Went and did my dressage test in the radioactive sun. Not sure where I finished. I thought it was last, but the person who came 6th was only 8% better than me.
She was a bit too hot and bothered poor thing to play up much but we pranced about like a giraffe on acid which doesn't go down well.
H2 and the kids are visiting next weekend! Wheee!
Went and did my dressage test in the radioactive sun. Not sure where I finished. I thought it was last, but the person who came 6th was only 8% better than me.
She was a bit too hot and bothered poor thing to play up much but we pranced about like a giraffe on acid which doesn't go down well.
H2 and the kids are visiting next weekend! Wheee!
Tuesday, July 02, 2013
why does blogger want me to give this a title? I've never titled my posts.
What a fucking mental day. I feel so drained! Went to my interview. Realised 3/4 of the way there that I'd left my passport at home as they requested I bring it.
Got to the nearest tube at 9. Great! I thought. Plenty of time to find it. (Been assured at most it was a 15 minute walk). Interview due at 9.30
Walked down road.
Turned out to be in wrong direction. Retraced my steps. Turned out to also be in the wrong direction. Retraced my steps back to the station.
Started heading in right direction. Now 15 minutes till interview.
Walked all the way down the road. Couldn't find any numbers as to know if I was going in the right direction. Realised at the end I was at 89. I needed 5.
Walked back to end of road. Couldn't see it.
9.20
Starting to get a bit fretty now.
Walked all the way back down the road and back again. I still can't see it. I asked someone in the newsagent. Couldn't help.
9.25.
Called them, described where I was. Got directions.
9.27. Nearly got ran over by one of Boris' bikes as I walked back down the road AGAIN.
A little distraught I asked a passerby. She didn't know.
9.30
Asked someone else for help. They and helpful passerby who had returned guided me to the door.
9.35.
I realised that i'd done preparation for the wrong university.
9.45. First question.
"So what do you know of our university."
"Erm.........."
I basically lied and said I'd lost my passport on the way, that's why I was so late. Not sure I did a win there! Will find out Friday. Not hopeful!
Went home via NMM and stopped to say hi to folk, walked back and stopped at cashpoint to get money out for my lesson. Somehow lost 10 quid walking home.
Tired and a little emotional, I had a nap.
Went Riding earlier than usual which was nice. Practised the test. I got dropped in canter once and told that I needed to make my shapes a bit bigger but also got "Bloody Brilliant." Yay Me.
After this I got a text from mum saying that I'd got a call from nationwide saying that I'm over drawn by 138 pounds. I think I must have not cancelled the isa payments from it properly.
Fixed now. Tired. Going to bed!
Got to the nearest tube at 9. Great! I thought. Plenty of time to find it. (Been assured at most it was a 15 minute walk). Interview due at 9.30
Walked down road.
Turned out to be in wrong direction. Retraced my steps. Turned out to also be in the wrong direction. Retraced my steps back to the station.
Started heading in right direction. Now 15 minutes till interview.
Walked all the way down the road. Couldn't find any numbers as to know if I was going in the right direction. Realised at the end I was at 89. I needed 5.
Walked back to end of road. Couldn't see it.
9.20
Starting to get a bit fretty now.
Walked all the way back down the road and back again. I still can't see it. I asked someone in the newsagent. Couldn't help.
9.25.
Called them, described where I was. Got directions.
9.27. Nearly got ran over by one of Boris' bikes as I walked back down the road AGAIN.
A little distraught I asked a passerby. She didn't know.
9.30
Asked someone else for help. They and helpful passerby who had returned guided me to the door.
9.35.
I realised that i'd done preparation for the wrong university.
9.45. First question.
"So what do you know of our university."
"Erm.........."
I basically lied and said I'd lost my passport on the way, that's why I was so late. Not sure I did a win there! Will find out Friday. Not hopeful!
Went home via NMM and stopped to say hi to folk, walked back and stopped at cashpoint to get money out for my lesson. Somehow lost 10 quid walking home.
Tired and a little emotional, I had a nap.
Went Riding earlier than usual which was nice. Practised the test. I got dropped in canter once and told that I needed to make my shapes a bit bigger but also got "Bloody Brilliant." Yay Me.
After this I got a text from mum saying that I'd got a call from nationwide saying that I'm over drawn by 138 pounds. I think I must have not cancelled the isa payments from it properly.
Fixed now. Tired. Going to bed!
Monday, July 01, 2013
hello?
Interview tomorrow!
And another lined up for next week! Welshy is home (albeit in Wales currently) and I have my competition this Sunday.
Genuinely looking forward to my day off tomorrow. Interview should be over by 10.30. Go home via Greeny and pop into the NMM as I want to see the new exhibit. Chat to people, wander up to the ROG and say hi.
Home. Nap. Ride early.
What a good day! :)
And another lined up for next week! Welshy is home (albeit in Wales currently) and I have my competition this Sunday.
Genuinely looking forward to my day off tomorrow. Interview should be over by 10.30. Go home via Greeny and pop into the NMM as I want to see the new exhibit. Chat to people, wander up to the ROG and say hi.
Home. Nap. Ride early.
What a good day! :)
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