A big whole bunch of randomness for you guys today!!

Thanks for the sympathy (And the bad jokes!!) It did make me giggle and normal service is kinda resumed until the next time!

As seen on El Tel's site, here's a list of the teams who's grounds I've visited on my football travels!

Arsenal.
Aston Villa.
Bolton.
Charlton.
Chelsea.
Fulham.
Man U.
Portsmouth
Derby
Leicester (both Filbert Street and The Walkers ground)
Norwich.
Sheff U.
Sheff Wednesday.
Chesterfield.
Doncaster.
Gillingham.
Notts Forest - Where I fell in the Trent in front of a bunch of Forest supporters and was soaking wet for the whole game!
Port Vale.
Rotherham.
Grimsby.
Stockport.

Plus, Wembley, Cardiff's Millennium stadium, and non-league Welling and York City.

Not a bad list huh?

I was also going to write about my NANOWRIMO efforts and about the riot in my school but that list has gone on for far longer than I actually thought it would, so you can look forward to hearing about them tomorrow and onwards!

Sick and fucking tired.

I'm sick of everything.
Nothings fun anymore and I feel like I hate everybody and everything.
Its all too much hassle, eating, sleeping, filling in these countless job applications when I'll only get rejected. Sitting in line in the job centre to be filled in with the rest of the spongers and scum. I'm sick of the fact that whenever my friends ask me what I've been up too I have nothing to say or no exciting stories to tell anyone.
I'm sick of the fact I've not had a good giggle in a long time or been carefree for ages. I'm sick that I feel guilty about even popping out for the afternoon.
I'm sick of the fact that all I want to do is sit in bed all day huddled under my duvet.
I fucking hate this and I'm sick of blogging boring, depressing shit.
Fuck it all.

Alex asked:

What is the best piece of advice that you have ever been given, and yet still ignored it...

I've been trying for a few days to think of what my reply to this would be.
I'm not very good with advice, some people go out looking for advice and act on it. I don't ask for it often, if ever and often when people have given me advice different to what I think, its made me all the more determined to go out and do the opposite of it anyway.
Or I don't tell people what I get up to or have planned until I've carried it out and then am left wondering why the hell it all went wrong.
The WORST piece of advice I've been given is from my Mothership and was "Don't go to uni, you won't like it and you won't cope. If you must go, apply locally and come home at nights"
Of course I ignored her and it was the best thing I've ever done.
I can think of several good pieces of advice like "Don't go with him" (meaning the BB) which I ignored and I'm glad I did.
I got told never to smoke so of course I had to have that one puff that then put me off for life!
I've been told to avoid drugs, and I have turned down the offer of weed but those don't really count do they?!
These are all good but surely not the best advice ever? There must be something more or have I just let a sheltered little life?

What about you guys? Whats the best advice you've ever been given and ignored or worst you've been given and ignored and do you regret it?

I went to bed reasonably early last night, after spending a busy day sanding, wiping and undercoating downstairs and then watching the England game trying as always to spot STF.
At 3am when I was in a half doze, the phone rings and I fall out of bed in an effort to answer it before the rest of my house is woken.
"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!"
"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!"

"Hullo STF."
He's clearly drunk and giggles down the phone to me and I'm so homesick for Derby and nights out and drunken fun.
"Are you still in Geneva?"
Through a rambled discussion over his soggy pizza and how he lost his match ticket stub in a bin and had to go through the bin to rescue it I find out that he rated Young, hadn't thought much of Konchesky, tried to chat up a french lady, despite only knowing "Do you know the way to the train station?" in French. And he demands that I come see him next weekend and get some Real Swiss Chocolate and when he found out Charlton have Man U he decided that he was coming down to see it and that I would be taking him to the Charlton away fixtures at White Hart Lane, Stamford Bridge and Highbury."
"Yes but STF where are you NOW?"
"I'm in Derby! Keep up! I've been leaving messages on everyone's answerphone, you're the only one who's picked the phone up!
Guess what? I fucked up getting back and I had to leave early! Only the second time ever I've had to leave early and we were 2-1 down with 87 minutes gone and then I get back to England and I find out we won! And I went out partying and everyone knew the score but me! And I had the fucking programme and ticket in my pocket. Did I tell you I dropped it in the bin?"

After ten minutes of rambling he dropped the phone down the stairs, told me his pizza was cold again and that he was now going to watch the highlights on telly and I try and get back to sleep.

Oops! Ok Spins here's the answer to that missing question:

"If you could do anything career-wise, regardless of family obligation or skill, what would you do?"
I'd be a marine biologist, working in the most amazing coral reefs and studying shark behaviour, and be damn rich doing it, or alternately I'd be the next David Attenborough, jetting round the world filming different animals for telly. All my life all I've ever wanted to do was work with animals and I was never smart enough at school to get the grades needed for vet school. I had the choice of going to Edinburgh to study Marine and Freshwater Biology, but I was struck by a terrifying thought of "what if I end up hating fish?"
So Zoology seemed like a nice way of getting a degree and not having to face the trauma of having to focus on one specific branch and I dont regret making that choice.
One day I'd like to go on and do a masters, perhaps in Marine Biology or Wildlife Conservation, but I want to do some living and saving(!) before I go back to studying. I need the break!

On to EL TEL's questions!!!

What would be the line-up (3 bands/performers) of your dream gig?
This is actually really hard! I like music as does everyone but I'm not fanatical about it like some people (wink, wink Flash!) In fact I only own three albums. I dont own a CD player, Mp3 or Ipod player and one of those albums is Flash's! So who would be in my dream gig?

Well We'll have to say Flash, just so I can leap around like a crazy person boasting of how I knew him before he became famous!
The next group I guess would have to be Queen. I'm working on the idea that I could invite who-ever I want for my dream gig and my Mum has always been a massive Queen fan and I think I've heard them everyday of my life whilst living at home and she missed her chance of going to a concert after falling and breaking some ribs the day of the show so I'd pick them and take her along for the ride.
Who else would I pick? Well I suppose I could be mocked for this but I'd like to see The Beatles or Paul Maccartney doing their greatest hits and some Wings songs, laugh all you like but who doesnt sing along with them when they come on the radio?
So I think that'd be my three performers, with special mentions to Green Day and The Killers.

What football fixture would you most like to see?

Charlton in the FA cup final/ Champions League final obviously! (Providing we won of course!!!)
International fixtures I'd like to see is an England game, I'm not fussy which, but if I could choose any I suppose I'd like to see them play Scotland, Germany or Argentina, just because I imagine the atomosphere to be great.
I'd also like to go to a match at the Nou Camp, I went there on a tour with school and the stadium was awesome empty so I 'd like to see a match there.
As for here, well I've been to Stamford Bridge, Old Trafford and Highbury. I still want to make the trips to Anfield and St James Park so those are fixtures I'd like to make one day.

If you had to move to a different town/city etc, where would you choose, and why?

I'm not too fussy really, I'd like to live in Cornwall at some point, but I'd live anywhere, I get bored and restless when I'm in the same place too long, so I'd like a career where I can move about a bit, but I'd live in any city that met these three requirements.
1 - Not too remote. I'm too much of a townie to live like The Twins or CL does
2 - Not too townie and built up, I've had enough of that here. Maybe surburby though.
3 - Where I could make it home for football easily enough.

And finally, what's the most useful thing that you learned whilst studying?

Leaving essays to the night/two days before before is a big nono!

Wow! Some real hard questions here!

Spinsterwitch: Tell me about the most memorable person in your life (who you no longer actively see or know)?
This is really quite difficult as I'm quite loyal in my friendships and all of them are people that I've know for many years. But once I decide to drop that person I do so without any thought or concern and don't look back to them.
Had you asked me this the year I went to uni I would have said OF having not seen or heard from her in nearly two years. She's obviously one of the first people I remember in my life outside of my family and my family are all reasonably close due to the football.
What about Primary school? Well I was a fairly solitary child, happy to play on my own, I had a few girlfriends, but by the last year they grew interested in boys, and clothes and music and other stuff I had no interest in so I walked away from that group and have rarely thought about them since, I could name names but not remember faces in that group.
There was a group of three or four lads that I played with. "The birdy game" Some crazy variant of chase and I remember them very clearly although I was never as close with them as I was my girlfriends and I've thought about them a few times over the years and could contact one of them via Friends Reunited but I'm always put off actually getting in touch in case my memories are tainted by him being an idiot.
They were kind, funny and yet somehow on the outskirts of the class, not quite in with the group and thats one of my overridding memories, of them being slightly alone from everyone else and running around in the playground, trying to catch them and "chop their wings off" while they squawked, laughed and avoided me, being the slow person that I was.
They were more fun to play with and be silly with than the other boys who refused to let me play their games or the girls who sat in groups and talked rubbish.
As for secondary school? Well I keep in touch with those that I wanted to and most of them I want to forget about.
There's a PE teacher WW who I got on very well with and we'd go riding with her and her daughter, who was about eleven years younger than us. She moved to New Zealand about seven or eight years ago and we keep in touch via the odd email and one day soon I hope to go out there and see her and her daughter.

So perhaps the most memorable people in my life that I'm no longer in touch with and wish I was are that group of four lads, all slight outcasts in their own way and who accepted me.

Most memorable person that I've no wish to get in contact with? Well you'd need a list as long as my arm to list the bullies from school, but perhaps the earliest of these was a boy who we'll just know as a dickmunch, he frequently treated me like I was inferior to him and would draw on me and on my clothes and hurt me without getting in too much trouble from the teacher.
Still I kicked him hard in the balls one day and that's enough revenge for me.

Tomorrow we'll answer El Tel's question(s)!

If anyone else thinks there is anything you want to ask? A story you want to find out about? Anything YOU think I should write about? Go mad and I'll try and do my best.

Sigh.
I like the idea of putting something down here everyday, but its hard to think up new ways or new variations of "I woke up. I played online, I watched Telly, I went to bed."
So what can I write about?
Well tomorrow I'm getting tickets for Villa (taking The Sheep! Should be interesting him meeting E!!!)

So here we go, I'll turn it over to you guys, is there anything you want to ask? A story you want to find out about? Anything YOU think I should write about?
Go mad and I'll try and do my best.

So the story of me getting shot.
Its a lot more dramatic than it actually was I'm afraid, so you might be disappointed.

About this time two years ago, I was living in my Derby house with MH and CL. It was a Tuesday night, I had been curled up on my favourite chair watching Man U on the Telly when The Hunter phoned me.
Now The Hunter does exactly what his name suggests. Sees a bunny rabbit BANG BANG! See's a squirrel BANG BANG! Sees a crow/pigeon. BANG BANG. Gun Nut.
I don't actually like this idea but I'm a townie so don't like sticking my nose into and saying this is wrong in my idea, cos what do I know about country life? And to be fair he does eat the rabbits and pigeons he shoots. And grey squirrels shouldnt be in this country anyway and crows are pests.

So anyway, I'm watching Telly downstairs, MH is upstairs tidying or whatever and CL is out with UDOBF.
So The Hunter rings me. "Whatcha up to? I'm bored?"
I said I was just watching football and he could come round and hang out if he liked. So I go up and take my contacts out and put my glasses back on and go back to watching my game.
The doorbell rings so I bounce up and go to let him in, he's bent down doing his shoelaces up, then I see a guy in dark get up emerge from behind CL's car.

The guy comes running up to the house firing, The Hunter darts for cover and I panic and try to slam the door shut while ducking behind it.
Several sharp pains in my stomach and then I can't see anything out of one eye, its blurry. I try and slam the door shut and the bloke shoves his foot into it.
I kicked him in the shin and try to slam it shut somemore.
The Hunter is laughing now and pushes the door open and I stare out at this guy blankly.
MH came running to the hallway at the sound of the shots and then retreated again.
Blankly I say Hello to his mate, still kinda dazed about what has happened in the space of thirty seconds.
Apparently the pair of them are pissed and gone on the rampage with a BB gun, I've been shot several times across the stomach and once in the face, that I assume is a rebound from something, its cracked my glasses.
If I hadn't had gone to put them on, I'd have been hit in the eye and God knows what. Blinded for all I know.
Have any of you been shot by a BB gun? Or for that matter gone Paintballing, I reccomend paintballing if you don't mind getting covered in bruises.
But the bruises from this. I don't know how to describe them, several red bumps across my stomach, sticking up, they were sore and painful for a few days before turning to interestingly coloured bruises that took several days to disappear and it cost me £70 to get new glasses.

I told you it was more exciting that what actually happened. But lately I've been thinking about it lots and what would have happened if I was blinded. Would my eye have exploded in a ball of gunk or would I have one of those blood bruises in it? Or have I just seen too many violent movies? Its a scary thought nonetheless

Pinched from Spins as I'm bored!

Name someone with the same birthday as you? Halle Berry apparently!

Where was your first kiss? The back room of Our Beloved Friary. I can point out the sofa where it happened behind the pool tables. I recieved a whoop too from my audience too!

Have you ever seriously vandalized someone's property? Apart from breaking my brothers Mr Frosty maker when I threw it down the stairs at him? No

Have you ever sang in front of a large group of people? Probably in one of those dreadful school play things they make you do to your bored parents in primary school, never solo though, my voice is dreadful!

What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? Eyes and smile, they have to have a kind face.

What really turns you on? Sense of humour

What do you order at Starbuck's? Hot Chocolate!

What is your biggest mistake? I dont think I have one

Have you ever hurt yourself on purpose? no.

Say something totally random about yourself I keep having nightmares about the time I got shot lately.

Has anyone ever said you look like a celebrity? Actually since posting that last pic on here that I did for GT, the one of me in the pink dress (bastard) I've shown it to STF and JF who said I looked like a ginger Sarah Michelle Gellar(?) and Herminone Granger from HP (I don't see either of those myself)

Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows? I love my Classic Disney movies and Harry Potter films and some kiddy TV shows are quite good, as well as the "retro" ones like Dangermouse, Thundercats and Trap Door.

Did you have braces? Oh God yes, fixed ones for two years and in some bizarre way I had coloured braces too, and did my nails to match, sometimes they were red and white (Charlton obviously!) or Green and Orange or Green and Red if it was near Christmas time, possibly one of the dodgiest decisions I've ever made there, and removeable ones for two years too that I was still supposed to wear till I was 22 but I lost them in the cinema (don't ask how!) and I never went back for new ones. I'll never forget the pain after they were tightened.

Are you comfortable with your height? Most of the people I hang with are a fair bit taller than me so I feel a little uncomfortable about it, but I'm of average height or a little under.

What is the most romantic thing someone has ever done for you?
Made me breakfast in bed, but then I'm not sure that counts as I kicked him in the back repeatedly until he gave in, someone did offer to buy me flowers once but I turned them down. So I don't think anyones done anything romantic for me!

When do you know it's love? I don't. I'm still deeply cynical about it.

Do you speak any other languages? Smattering of German, a couple of words of Spanish and I can say "Winnie the Pooh and the Forest of Blue Dreams" in French, as I'm sure you'll agree thats a useful thing to say.

Have you ever been to a tanning salon? Don't be daft

What magazines do you read? The ones that come in the paper.

Have you ever ridden in a limo? Yup

Has anyone you were really close to passed away? I'm working on it! But my Granddad, Great Granddad and a man I knew from the stables.

Do you watch MTV? Sometimes late at night, when they sign the songs, its quite funny.

What's something that really annoys you? Arrogance.

What's something you really like? ICE CREAM!

Do you like Michael Jackson? Some of the older stuff.

Can you dance? Yup, when drunk and very badly too!

What's the latest you have ever stayed up? I'm an ex-student! Every student has pulled an all nighter at some point or another!

Have you ever been rushed to the ER by ambulance? No but MH was in our last night in Derby and my dream was always to ride in an ambulance so I demanded that I got taken along for the ride.

Do you read these whe someone fills them out? Yup.

Firstly. Flash - Scunthorpe?!
I've been to Bognor Regis, to the Butlins and it snowed. However I did get to see Black Lace and sing Agadoo!
I'm not really an Ibiza type person so nope and Amsterdam! Don't even let them see that suggestion! Its bad enough taking care of them pissed without being stoned out of their head too! Although apparently they have a museum of gay pornography so they might like that!
El Tel - I'd actually like to go to Hull, I want to see The Deep. MH went to look at a uni there for her Masters and I was going to go to on a day trip out but stupid uni got in the way.

But here's the choices.
Goa, New York or Las Vegas.

Each one clearly very appealing in their own way. And I really want to be going where-ever they finally decide on going, but nothings ever that simple for me. I can't see Dad being here at the end of this month, let alone February next year but if by some miracle he is, I won't want to go away, I feel guilty enough as it is when I go out for the day and its stopped me going to Derby for the odd weekend as I feel bad at leaving them, but I have to leave the house sometimes.
I want to go and I want to say, yup sign me up now but then I don't want to have to let them down later in the line.
Plus there's the matter of his birthday being on the same day as my Mothership and I can't let her down too and I need to fit things in around my football.
And he wants to get everything planned and organised by the end of this month.
What's a girl to do?

Guess where STF wants to go for his birthday in Feb?
Go on!
Of course he's the kinda person to pull these things off but I'm not, so I'm keeping fingers crossed that nothing comes to screw me over.
Knowing my luck I'll still be in the same position I am now and unable to go anywhere but its a nice thing to dream about.

Here's a thought that The Sheep has just put to me.

The lads that I collect are all non-threatening. They are all teddies, there are a couple I wouldn't like to fall out with, N, LF, BB and J although they've always been sweet with me but the rest of my motley collection are softies.
He reckons as I'm a girl with classically 'masculine' traits, I find myself drawn to associate with men who have 'feminine traits' and vice versa, like we're all looking for the traits we're lacking in in each other.
I never really thought about it that way.
What do you guys think? Do you think its just random or do you think there's some sorta deep psychological reason behind the people we choose to have as friends?
Its far too deep a thought for me to have before bedtime, that's for sure!

"Bollocks." I thought to myself. "It's 2pm on the first day of this NanoWriMo and I still haven't got a fucking clue what I'm going to write about."
(My potty mouth extends to my mind too, although I daren't swear out loud.)
I'd had a few ideas, one I may return too, another a horror/thriller story, but I like to plan the main details of my stories before I sit and write them and this I realised last night borrowed heavily on "The Shining" so I dumped that idea.
So I was stuck.
I was clearing out the spare room, which had piles of junk from the attic in it, piles of old teddies, board games, my train set and Care Bears and books.
I have a huge collection of Enid Blyton, descended from my Mother and Aunty. I was never really into them, prefering the more exciting things like "The Hardy Boys" and "Three Investigators."
I particularly had the two school series, "Malory Towers" and "The Twins at St Claire's." I wasn't too into them, compared to books about murders and mysteries, tales of midnight feasts and lacrosse matches weren't exactly thrilling!
I flicked through them idily and remembered a few characters that had stuck out, Bill the tomboy, I'm not totally sure but I think she was the one really into her horses, and I can't remember the characters in those books, but I still remember the name of all her horses!!
And Carlotta, the gypsy/circus girl.
I remembered her cos she stood out from the middle-class girls with their boring lives, she was exotic, different, banned from living the lifestyle she wanted and forced to conform to the boring, greyness of the other schoolgirls and although by the third or forth book she was like the others, that idea stayed with me.
What if I was in that situation? Taken away from all I loved and forced to live with a family I didn't know and told to keep quiet about her background?

Two hours later, with the seeds of inspiration starting to grow in my head, I sat down in front of the computer and typed this:

"She sat in the dark shadows partially hidden by a tent, there were no nerves or any sign of emotion on her face, but the horse that she was sitting on showed her nerves.
There’s was a new act and one that had so far gone down a treat with audiences. The horse shifted its weight and jangled its bit, twitching its tail.
“Steady Sunny.” She smoothed, fixing a piece of mane that had been mussed up.
The horse was a beautiful palomino, part Arab, golden body, silver mane and tail and eye catching white markings on the legs and face.
She was dressed in a cowboy outfit of bright green and white, contrasting perfectly with the colour of the horse. She heard the applause as the act before her finished and the curtains parted suddenly and she was momentarily blinded by the light."

I'm not sure where I'm going to go with this, I have no little plans for my characters in my head, but I've managed to scrape 2,000 words out of it so far.
I don't know what kinda story it's going to turn out like or even if it'll make the word requirement but its gonna be fun finding out!

So here's my Halloweeny ghosty story.

About two years ago, I went on holiday to Bridlington, with the LF, J and MH. The place where we stayed was a Bed and breakfast and we were on the top (4th) floor, overlooking a row of smaller houses, perhaps about three stories high.
Anyway, the house was being converted to a B&B and many of the rooms were still empty and we had the 4th floor to ourselves and the 3rd was empty, which was a good thing considering the noise we made!
It was a fairly nice place, I didn't see anything wrong with it, apart from the quietness, I'm too used to all my city hustle and bustle I guess!
One night I was watching The Terminator2 in the Living room, after we came home from a night out, the LF was talking lovingly to a keg of Stella that was in the kitchen and MH and J were having one of their silent and at this stage fairly frequent arguments in their bedroom and I was all alone and surprisingly sober in the living room.
Now picture a large white painted room, with a sofa against the wall where the door opened and facing the fireplace and the mirror, the TV was in front of the window, and the wall facing the window was plain white, not even a picture rail or a dado rail.
I'd just watched the part of the film where John Connor's foster parents are killed and I noticed something and glanced up and away from the TV to the window.
There was someone standing there reflected in the window, in an stone archway.
Now remember that it couldn't have been the TV, and the houses opposite where too small for it too be someone over the road.
What the hell was it?
I glanced over to the facing wall, as expected it was a plain white wall, I glanced over at the mirror, I don't even know why, I was just expecting something to be there, nothing.
At the window again and then at the wall. In the space of 30 seconds or so.
I looked over at the window and then the figure walked off, arms swinging, past the stone arch.
I leapt to my feet and went to the window, nothing, I felt really uneasy and went to find LF in the kitchen.
Was it a ghost? I don't know, Like I say I looked for any reasonable explanation and it wasnt even like the tv could be reflecting it, it was the wrong kinda film.
I can't tell you what they were wearing, if it was a he or a she although I have the feeling it was female.

That happened fairly early on in our holiday and I said nothing about it to anyone, I dont know why, I just didnt.
Anyway the other spooky thing, while we were staying there was odd.
The living room also doubled as mine and the LF's bedroom, one night we were laying in bed, just starting to drift off to sleep, when he spoke to me.
"is your arm moving?"
I was on my side, arms tucked under the duvet and shook my head.
"nope."
Silence again for a bit and then he suddenly sat bolt upright, looking at either end of the bed.
"what is it?" I asked, he shook his head. "Nothing, lie down, go to sleep."
I sulked and lay back down, shortly after he lay back down too.
After the holiday we were talking about our holiday back in York, MH remarked that she hadn't liked to stay in one room on her own as she felt it was creepy and I remembered LF's strange behavour and asked him as he looked odd.
"There were shapes at the end of our bed, two of them, white shapes."
He believes very strongly in things like that and believes he sees things, I don't know whether he does or don't or what.
So there you go. Was there figures at the end of our bed? I don't know, I believe that there was from his reaction.
What did I see? I dont know, I just know that it wasn't anything I expected it to be.

What do you guys think??!!

Its halloween! I love halloween, I love scary movies!
Lets play the Salem game!
In honour of the occasion, I'd like you - yes you that lurker in the corner there! To tell me your ghost stories, has anything creepy, unexplainable happened to you?
Do you believe in ghosts? Tell us all about it!
Go on! Go wild! And if nothing ghosty has happened to you, tell me your favourite horror movie, horror urban legend! Best Halloween costume!
Come on people, lets get in the spirit of this thing, I'll be very disappointed if no one plays!

Was today predictable or what?
Ah well next home game is Man U - No problems there!
Todays got me worried, we looked incapable of winning, is that cos we were knackered after our midweek antics or are we too reliant on Bent?
I like to think its cos we were knackered. Its a nice excuse anyway!

Our reward for beating - yes Jose beating, as in you lost! - Chelski is a home draw against Blackburn, I wanted a home draw and definately wanted to avoid Arse, United, Pal-arse and Millwall but not sure if that'd be a nice game or not.

Grrr of the day goes to the Woolwich Job centre.
Who last week told me I had a meeting today, and sent me a letter during the week about coming to a "new deal" meeting next week also.
So yawning muchly I make my way to Woolwich, I await half hour AFTER MY APPOINTMENT WAS SCHEDULED to get my turn at the desk and then get sent to another desk, where I wait another 10 minutes to be told by a man who clearly couldn't believe I was so thick that the New Deal meeting cancelled out this one and I need not have bothered, although there was nothing on the letter, either letter(!) about this.
Bastards.

I'm in total shock!
My voice is hoarse and croaky, my hands hurt and I'm still shaking!

SHALALALALALA WE SENT THE CHELSEA OUT!

We were goddamn fucking awesome. I think I'm entitled to be a little biased, but my fucking shit!
We out sang and at times out played the Chelski, John Terry was their man of the match, saving them several times.
And we lost El Kark! I swear I have no fingernails left for Saturday!
Surprised to see Powelly last the entire game and injury time, was almost expecting to see an oxygen tank be wheeled onto the pitch for him!
And Penalties after all that! I felt sick - and it was nothing to do with the cunt next to me throwing up in the first half and then passing out, dribbling till penalties!
I was so sure that with their class, they'd outplay us and Curbs has just said that he had to bully players into taking penalties!
Me and E were laughing before hand about Chrissy taking one and remembering the penalty he took against Welling one year!
At I'm not ashamed to admit I could hardly bear to look when Hughes took his!

THAT'S WHY WE'RE SECOND! THAT'S WHY WE'RE SECOND!

A proper match review can be found on here Better than I could do!
Fingers crossed for a home draw please!!!!!!!!

Updated with pretty pictures! If ever there was a blog entry deserving of them its this one!

Random thoughts for the day!

Spins - Beware the butterfly! Sunshine Will know what I'm talking about!

I'm going to Chelski tonight! I've never been before as paying forty quid is well outta my bracket, but they're only 20 quid tonight so yay!

Probably alienating all you Americans out there but my fucking god, how annoying is Frank? I want to smack his silly head in! Stupid advert makes me want to take up drugs just to have that kid come to me so I can dangle him out the window by his ankles until he promises to behave!

Ok I give in, better put this insommnia to good use! I'm signing up for this NaNoWriMo thingymajig and let's see what happens or will it be another one of those things I fail at!

Its like being back at uni, here I sit with a tub of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie Ice-cream, several bottles of alcohol, solitaire ready to bring up on screen when I get bored and a job application to fill in, ready to be emailed tomorrow. (S0 no different really from the essays I ujsed to write the day before!)
I think I'm fully prepared to witter on about shit I have no idea about!
Yippie!
Now do you think "hire me you bastards or I'll firebomb your office" do as my opening statement on my covering letter?

Just come back from a party at OF's, (owner of the gorgeous and now famous Dotty!) funny having to go all the way to West Sussex to see them now instead of climbing over a fence or the more recent two minute walk round the corner.
Its the sorta place that they should have had from the beginning what with their animal collection that they always had. Now they have enough land to have a small-holding and three acres of woodland around them. Indeed OF was talking of getting a pig, she's wanted one for ages!
Dad coped surprisingly well, last weeks emergancy rush to hospital seems to have sorted him out for the time being and he's almost back to being his old chirpy self.
I miss not living next door to them, I hardly know anyone my age in this street and E is a few miles away in Plumstead.
Different to having your best friend on the other side of a fence and always bouncing in and out of each others houses and sleepovers every weekend.
I still think of her as my best friend although we can go weeks or months without seeing each other and only the odd MSN conversation or text.
She's the sister I never had as a child and her family are like extended versions of mine and I'm closer to them than I am my own uncles who I see every week.
Let's hope it lasts at least another 18 years of friendship! Hurrah!

I'm not gloating or anything. Honest!!

From C.U.A.S.

Predictions - Oct 05
1. Charby - 26 points
2. Ben - 22 points
3. El Tel - 21 points
4. Mike - 20 points
5. Rufus Fan - 18 points
6. Flash - 17 points
7. Lord B - 17 points
8. Swiss - 17 points
9. Weenie - 17 points
10. Alex - 15 points
11. Dom - 0 points
12. Tricky - 0 points

Predictions Total
1. Charby - 99 points
2. El Tel - 81 points
3. Swiss - 78 points
4. Alex - 76 points
5. Rufus Fan - 76 points
6. Weenie - 76 points
7. Mike - 72 points
8. Ben - 69 points
9. Lord B - 69 points
10. Dom - 59 points
11. Flash - 56 points
12. Tricky - 35 points

Is it wrong that I made Mothership wheel me round B&Q and Dad walk?

I didn't think so either!

I've FINALLY got the rest of THOSE pictures through from GT.

Obviously I'm not showing any more off that what has been seen and if you missed them tough!
But I do like this one. This gives away my internet anonymity more than any other that I've posted so its a 24 hour jobby I'm afraid.

GONE!

Baah. I hate London.
I managed - miracles of miracles to get to St Pancras on my new route and to take MH to where she wanted to go.
And then the morning was my own!
So what did I do with it?
I started by strolling down Oxford Street. How I hate the crowds getting in my way and my fucking god, there was tourists taking pictures of fucking Debinhams! Do you not have shopes in other countrys?
I can imagine it now.
"Oooh Look Doris, this is one of those London things. A shop"
"Oooh Mavis. Did you go in?!"
"No I wasn't sure of the protocol in these places, but I have a nice picture of the shop window.!"
I mean honestly what the fuck do you want a picture of a shop window for? And a busker? And a tube carriage?
Freaky fucks.
So I walked all the way down Oxford Street and then went into HMV where I sat reading a book on Bill Hicks for two hours (Ha! Take that fuckfaces! I READ a book in HMV instead of browsing for DVD's or CD's.!)~
How I hate fucking tourists, they toddle along at .5 centimetres an hour an walk 5 abreast so its impossible to overtake and you have to slow down for them and then they stop suddenly and you collide into the back of them when they stop to answer their mobiles or look a maps or take 90 degree turns into shops and then have the cheek to tut at you when you cant stop in tim and collide into them.
I then found MH and we went to Pizza Hut in Leicester Square for tea, (again I got us there without getting lost - I'm great me!)
And then I found our way to the pub me and Flash Found our way to outside of Euston on our adventure and we stat and srank.
And that's why speellling is a little poopoo.
Hurrah for being on the nice side of Lopndon!

Grr. MH is coming to London tomorrow to go to a churchy thing, and I'm an added bonus! Somehow I've agreed to escort her across London in the morning and find something to do while she does her Churchy thing in the morning and then hang out with her.
She's not got any idea how to get across London, where this place actually is, or how to get there, which is where I've been roped in.
So I've been looking up new ways of getting to St Pancras to meet her (just my luck to have the Northern Line down!) and then to get her across to WC1, kick my heels around for several hours (it won't be worth coming home again) unless I find something exciting to look at or visit and then repick her up and take her back home.
I feel that somehow I've been conned into organising all this for her. Sigh.

See J! Good things come to those who wait! I was going to write about the football but then The Brat pinched the computer off of me!

Didn't you shout at the TV when they brought Crouch the BFG on? It was a kinda pointless game we knew what, so why didnt they play Bent who's scoring trillions of goals for fun? Grr to it all, I'd have started with him anyway rather than Teacher's Pet Owen. Still it was a bit more interesting than the snoozefest at the weekend.
I think Luke had another solid game though and definately must have cemented a place for the World Cup.
Report here! I am still expecting another report from STF who is doing/falling for the Geneva scheme so he can go to Germany and follow England about how Gary Nev's spot if safe, I wonder if for this friendly he'll make the effort and play Bent or the shock - call up Murphy?

Oh and welcome J as a new commentator! Hope you return!

'm very sorry to use this medium to contact you,but owing to the urgency that i have be in touch with you.
I am one of the top aides of a governor in south-south Nigeria,for security reasons i will mention the name to you in the course of our discussion.
He has instructed me to ask you for help which will be of benefit to you,as i know you will be ready to help.Recently in our country the present adminstration has decided to fight corruption to the last and our president have decided to focus his searchlight on we the governors from the south -south Nigeria,because we produce the crude oil which sustain the Nigerian economy.
Two state governors are already victims,first the governor of plateau state Chief.Joshua Dariye,he was caught in London and jump bail.Presently he can not travel out of the country as he is wanted.
Most recently the governor of Bayelsa state,Chief Dr.Diepreye Alamieyeseigha was caught in London with huge sum of money.He has been charged to court and remand in prison custody in london.
For you to believe,kindly ask Nigeria embassy in your country for comfirmation or British embassy in your country.
Based on this my boss who is one the serving governor has asked me to approach you for assistance as we will not want to travel out of the country ,also any member of his family to travel.You will be rewarded handsomely if you will help out.
He has some funds in some foreign countries,so he will like you to front for him.And collect the funds on his behalf for save keeping and investment pending the completion of his tenure as governor.
So if you are willing to help,kindly contact me,giving your own contact details.In order for me to contact you with the full details.Here is the email address you are to reply to johnamori@ummah.org.
Note if you are not going to help,do not respond to this mail.
John Amori.
Special assistant.

I'M GOING TO BE RICH!!! WHOOOO!

Wheelchair on Friday!!! Yay! I figure I can steal it to play on without him knowing and keep it until the novalty value wears off and I can go back to walking.

Remember Puppy Dotty who came to visit last month?
Look at her now! She's huge!

I sometimes wonder how much I should write about Dad on here.
As much as we joke and laugh about it, it does rule our life, but I never like that. I don't like the fact that no-one can leave the house now and leave him home alone and that our lives seem ruled by methadone hallucinations and medicines and diets.

So I don't try to talk about it unless I have too. But then I worry that cos I don't write or talk about how he is getting worse, that I'll come across as unfeeling or uncaring. But I don't like to talk about it, Actually I don't care about talking about it, I'll tell total strangers about how he's about to kick the bucket, or I'll just fob them off with "he's fine ta." But I can't and dislike talking about HOW I feel about it, despite everyone prodding and poking and demanding "That I just open up dammit!"

So how is Dad lately? He's bad, very bad. He spent most of the week a fortnight ago in hospital and none of us were sure if he was coming out again.
He spends a lot of time either asleep or doped up on methadone, telling me about how he "fell" out of the window in the attic.
He's lost total use of his left arm, as the tumour has pressed too much on the nerves. The thought now is to give him something that will totally kill the nerve and take away even the little use of the arm that he has.
Dad was thinking about that. But now the other arm is going. A few times now he's dropped things out of his hand because the grip has gone and he's spilt medicine and tea.
Wednesday he spilt his cup of tea on the brand-new cream carpet, which really upset him and he started to get weepy.
Thursday I had to feed him his medicine and his cup of tea and that embarrasses him as much as it does when I have to help him dress sometimes.
(We brought him a babies beaker - you know with the lids! - I don't think he was that impressed!)
The Brat especially is finding this hard, he can hardly bear to be in the same room as him or look at him. He escapes from it all by work and sleeping, but I don't have that.

He's dying now, We're no longer in denial and pretending that tomorrow he will wake up and there will be a miracle. He's dying and it depresses him and he spends a lot of time in thought or the rest of the time he's so drugged up he don't know what he's doing.
Although things carry on as normal and we laugh and joke and try and act like everythings good. But it's not.
It's a matter of trying to make the most of everything, and remembering that he was well once and was told over a year ago that at best he had nine months to go and waiting for the ineviatable really.

(Spins - Your prize will be in the post early next week sometime! I just need to get it wrapped!)

Question:

If you asked someone if they've missed you and they reply with:

"There has been a trout-shaped hole in my life lately."

Is that a good thing, or do you twat them for taking the piss?

I twatted him. I think it was the right decision.

Oooh My Dad's getting a wheelchair!

No stairlift though, which disappoints me, I was looking forward to bezzing up and down on one of those.

After all the hype 5,000 never got in touch, which is probably Flashy-washy-wishy-pishy?
(Stop now I hear my brain telling me so I will.)
We never fully celebrated this occasion and I demand that R makes a special one-off comment to mark this event cos we all miss him!
Anyway. To the prizes. Flash never gave his address before Monday so he's forfeit the prize and according to the rules of the game it then goes to number 4,999 which I think we decided goes to Spinsterwitch.
Hurrah! for Spins! There really is a prize so if you want to claim it drop us a line.

Flash - There is still the honour of being my 5,000th visitor, which is something that you can put on your blog! (bear with me I'm dosed up to the eyeballs on lemsip and I think it's doing stranger things than usual to my brain) There is also the invite to help me celebrate my new ill-gotten yellowcard (of which I had to put up with the sleazing of a strange guy to get - but it was worth it) one Saturday perhaps the 22nd of this month? Lemmie know?!

The next fantastic prize will be going at 15,000 page views!

Oh God guys!
Remember my photos that I had done with GT (as if any of you have forgotten)
I hadn't put them all on to a CD and wiped them from the computer, and then when the computer died, I couldnt turn it on so took it too a shop to get repaired, thinking that my files would be wiped.
Only I've just found the files on a back-up folder and specifically nude photos!!!
What if the Computer People found them and saw them?
What if they all had a wank over them in their workroom?
What if they all copied the files for private use?
What if they all end up on Google Images?

*Goes into nervous breakdown*

Erk.
Every year its the same thing, not always this early though.
Every year for a week I wake up with a dry, sore throat and a bunged up throat.
Always when the central heating goes on.
Its quite painful really, and what makes it worse is that its the same whenever I go anywhere else to stay with central heating.
It always takes me a week to acclimatise to the lack of humidity (Its the only thing I can put it down to) in the house.
Luckily I'm pretty healthy otherwise!

Oooh Addicks on Soccer am!

Ok, at time of writing I see 5,003 on my counter.

And according to the Site Meter counter number 4,999 was reached by an IP address in California, specifically San Francisco. (Spinsterwitch?)

5,000 was reached by....
...........
...........
.........

*Drumroll please*
........


Ridgemont in Milton Keynes in England.

An Address In Reading PA was 5,001 so I'm guessing that was you Sunshine.
Hyde - According to the Site-referrer you were actually 4,998, if you were the New York address
I'm not sure whether there was a hitch on keeping up with the hits that came by or what but the winner seems to be Milton Keynes!

If you guys wanna check it out I think you can all access it by clicking the counter at the bottom.

And Congratulations to Milton Keynes. If you want to claim the prize can you drop me an email by Monday? If not then according to the rules of the game, it'll roll over to the next nearest which is 4,999.

Bastards.
I went to bed at 3am ready for my New Deal appointment, of which I'm not happy at 10.30. In order to get to Woolwich I need to get on the 178 (A very, very good bus as its direct) or the 386 (A good bus if you need to time waste before you get to Woolwich as it goes all round the back-streets and takes a good 10 - 20 minutes longer that the 178)
(I digress)
Anyway, this means I leave my house an hour before I need to be there and I wake up 8am, still rather pissed off about Nanny being here.
At 8.45 they ring and cancel my appointment - Wow cheers for that fuckfaces.
So I go shopping with Nanny and Mum instead.
After the brief argument over needing to wear a seatbelt, we arrive at Asda, she gets distracted by a baby.
Every few minutes she stops and looks at the stuff in a trolley.
"is this ours?"
"No Nan, look this one five millimetres away is ours."
"Oh yeah."
Every bit of food we look at and add to our trolley, she tries to add and we try and convince her otherwise.
"Ooh I dunno whether to get that or not."
Cue 10 minutes of patient waiting while she thinks, it always ends the same way.
"Oooh I'll get it, hopefully he'll be home tonight."
"No Nanny, he's in all weekend remember?"
"Is he?"
"Yes."
Its exhausting.
When we got home it was "Has he rung?"
"G rang remember?"
"Oh yes."
"So has he rung yet?"
"G rang for him, remember?"
For the 2oth time she tried something different.
"Ooh I'd have thought G or Granddad have rung by now."

And shock, horror we've got her again tonight EVEN THOUGH Uncle I is picking her up from the hospital, why can't he stay with her in HER house, where she feels safe and secure and most importantly won't get lost?
Cos he's a selfish cunt that's why.

4,968!!!

Must.........stay awake to see the big 5,000 can't miss it like I did last time there was a competition!

I am so extremely pissed off.
Granddad went in today for his pacemaker fitting and somehow we've ended up with Nanny moving in.
Don't get me wrong, I love my Nanny but bloody hell, we've got Dad - who lets face it is dying, and Mum who desperately needs an operation but has postponed it for 6 months at least and now we have Nanny living with us, is a sandwich short of a picnic. (Alzheimers) and who is exhausting.
Aunt G has L and T, Uncle's M and D have no one. Why can't they stop with her over night? Why when it comes to them are we the ones that everyone expects to run around after Nanny and Granddad?
Incidently, its a shame what that illness does to a person, my Nanny's 5'0" in her socks and I remember her being scared of nothing, barging into a crowd of pissed-up 20-somethings to break up a fight, a real old battleaxe as my Dad described her.
Now she's afraid of her own shadow. Its sad to see the change in her.

Come on, come on! So close but yet so far!!!!

You know you have those "where were you when...." moments?
My Mothership can tell me that when she heard that Elvis was dead, she was in the dentist getting a filling.
When Princess Diana died, I was on a riding holiday in Kent, and even then I knew that telly for the next week or so would be as boring as hell with all that on, I didn't predict everyone turning into pathetic jelly though.
One day in September I was sitting on the arm of the settee singing along to "Forever Autumn" One of my favourite songs incidently, waiting for my Dad and Brat to come home and idly flicking through the tv channels.
I glanced over at the telly and saw a plane fly into a tower and I laughed at the special effects on that film, and then realised that I was watching a BBC news special.
Another one of those days (although not as world-shattering!) was when the earthquake struck Dudley in the West Midlands.

I had only just moved into my Derby house a few weeks earlier, and had been talking to MH on my bed as was our habit, putting her disasterous love life to rights and nattering about nothing and everything.
I put my radio on to sleep, so I could listen to it for an hour or so before going to bed, and it had just finished when I heard a low growl. It reminded me of hearing the HGV's that drive up and down our street early morning sometimes.
But it grew too powerful for that and then our entire house shook briefly. I felt my bed go and grasped the edges, feeling like something in The Exorcist.
Then as quickly as it came it passed, and then I heard the growl again and it shook the house again, lasting longer this time.
And I saw the wardrobe across me move.
I don't remember being scared, more startled, I think this one was the aftershock, I've heard that they can be worse than the actual quake itself.
I sat bolt upright in bed, still clinging onto my bed, I wanted to turn the light on but was worried too while we were shaking so.
Actually the first thought in my head was "earthquake!" and then I dismissed it, earthquakes in England - Hahahha!
All this in a few seconds and as suddenly as it started it finished and I leapt out of bed, grabbing my glasses and running into the hallway, more adrenalised than scared.
MH came flying out of her room, no glasses, no dressing gown.
"What the hell was that?"
"I dont know!"
"It was a bomb! I'm sure of it"
"Don't be daft, I remember when they bombed the Docklands, it felt totally different."
"Well then its that petrol garage, at the end of the road, somethings gone wrong and it's blown up!"
(Always over-dramatic is MH)
I went back into my room and leaned out the window.
"I dont think so."
She followed me in. "I was so scared, I turned my light on I didn't know what it was."
"I didn't in case the electric went funny and exploded."
She sat on my bed.
"what was it? "
"Earthquake. Or aliens landing." I suggested picking the two most random suggestions out of my head.
We sat on my bed for a few moments marvelling that T who lived downstairs at the time had slept through it and wondering what it could be before going back to sleep.
I put my radio back on and listened to what ever was on at the time, I suspect it may have been some crap boyband.
Then the radio fizzled and jumped, and a mans voice came clearly out of the radio.
"I'm watching you."
And thats what scared me, I leapt out, ran to the window to check there was no one in the garden and then turned the radio off and dived under my duvet and didnt come out till morning.

What was that voice? I have no idea. I have a few suspicions though.
I'm also impressed that my memory is so clear from a night that happened a few years ago now.

Over at LavaLady's site I found this:
A list of frequently challenged books, I'm not sure why they are like this. I've always been encouraged to read anything and everything and although I can understand people kicking off if there kids were given Sex by Madonna perhaps I dont get it - Where's Waldo? I'm assuming thats the same as Where's Wally here.
Anyway here's the list of them and those that I've read are bolded.


Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz
Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling
Forever by Judy Blume
Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
The Giver by Lois Lowry
It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine
A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck
The Color Purple by Alice Walker
Sex by Madonna
Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle
Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers
In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard
The Witches by Roald Dahl
The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein
Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry
The Goats by Brock Cole
Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane
Blubber by Judy Blume
Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan
Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier
Final Exit by Derek Humphry
The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George
The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
Beloved by Toni Morrison
The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton
The Pigman by Paul Zindel
Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard
Deenie by Judy Blume
Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden
The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar
Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz
A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein
Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole
Cujo by Stephen King
James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell
Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
Ordinary People by Judith Guest
American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras
Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
Crazy Lady by Jane Conly
Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher
Fade by Robert Cormier
Guess What? by Mem Fox
The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende
The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney
Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
Lord of the Flies by William Golding
Native Son by Richard Wright
Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Fantasies by Nancy Friday
Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen
Jack by A.M. Homes
Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya
Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
Carrie by Stephen King
Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume
On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge
Family Secrets by Norma Klein
Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole
The Dead Zone by Stephen King
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
Always Running by Luis Rodriguez
Private Parts by Howard Stern
Where’s Waldo? by Martin Hanford
Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene
Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman
Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
Running Loose by Chris Crutcher
Sex Education by Jenny Davis
The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene
Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell
View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts
The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder
The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney
Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

I can't understand the reasoning behind some of those.

Wheee!

Ever have one of those days when you do sod all but you've been really busy?
I went and picked up the busted computer £111!!!! Ouchie! lucky this week is Rich week!

I saw Spinsterwitchs post about earthquakes and I meant to tell you about the Dudley Quake that I lived through and Blogger ate my post *shakes fist at it*

Also Daddy-long-legs or craneflies - Are they the most stupid insect ever? They fly around, drunkenly bashing into things and creeping me out with those long legs and then sit on the floor for me to step on barefoot, yucky!

Oh! Oh! Look at me here! I rule man! Although I expect this good run to come to an end soon and me to finish bottom of the table

We won again!!!

I had made vague plans to go to that game with The Brat, possibly meeting TY'U in Birmingham, but with Dad in hospital we decided against it.
(He's home now - Yay!)

Chelsea in the cup though? I hope they bring out a 5th choice squad and we somehow nick a win otherwise I fear our cup run will again be coming to an end before it even gets started.

Stupid, stupid, stupid men! Do you not realise I can play the "lets talk in double meanings and be sleazy" game as well as you and I can win everytime too?
Honestly! Do you think I crawled out of the gooseberry bush this morning?
And 31! You're far too old for me mate, its just sad.

Happy birthday E!

We went on a mini-pub crawl in Greenwich and I won myself a new yellowcard! (They are a student only deal and I was afraid of losing it in October when it ran out and no more pound a pint nights for me, although I'm hardly ever in Derby on Mondays now and dont make the Greenwich ones on Thursday night as I have no one to go with)
But I have a new one! And it didnt cost me a £1! Although I tried to pay for it the barman wouldn't hear about it and gave it to me! Yes! Result!

AND Dad's coming outta hospital tomorrow! I miss him. Can't wait for him to come home!

More responses to my Meme!

SPINSTER WITCH!!

1. You are a mensch! This isn't random, but it's patently true. (What's a mensch? It sounds like a drink ?)
2. Sense and Sensibility (the movie) (I've never read or seen it, I shall make an effort to read it though, any excuse to find a new book!)
3. Tangerine
4. No football tarot readings. (Shame :( )
5. You and Cheryl racing to be the first to comment on one of Flash's posts.
6. A colt - strong, energetic, already beautiful, but almost surely to develop into grace and poise, playful.
7. If talent, family obligation and location were not factors, what would you do for a career? (I'd love to get involved in some form of conservation work, maybe breeding something to be returned to the wild. In this country though)

Hyde!

1. You think vultures are cute. That still blows my mind! (All animals have something about them to make them cute.)
2. Wuthering Heights! (It's weird... I thought this up last night and we have the same answers for eachother for this question and the next!) I first loved this book on my own, and then it sort of became a thing for me and Narc. But when I read about you fantasizing about running throught he moors, I felt a soul-connection to you. (How cool! And strange!)
3. Strawberry!
4. So? Am I invited to the tea party or not? (Only if you bring a teddy!)
5. First I only knew you through Flash and Sunshine's blogs. You appeared as a commenter on the Annals in early April when you told me to take out my Narc-shit "on a punching bag." In May you were jealous of all the spanky sailors here in Manhattan; and by June, you became my virulent defender. I've got nothing to fear with you to beat up all the boys for me! (Grrr! Thats me Super-Charbs! I can't stand to see people I know treated like shite.)
6. Unicorn--strong and sweet with a touch of fantasy! (If only there was real ones!)
7. What are you going to do next with your life? The sky's the limit, and I'm really curious where you'll be off to! ( Travel. I want to go to New Zealand, and Australia and Iceland and everywhere in between!)


Answers for Sunshine!

1. Passionate.
2. I remember you posting the lyrics to Guns 'n' Roses Patience once, I always connect that with you now.
3. Lemon!
4. Pierced? Dodgey! What if it like,... got lost?
5. I first knew you from the comments you posted during the LF Saga in November and then from a quick MSN conversation while I was revising for one of my last exams in Derby.
6. Ferret - Short, sweet and Strong!
7. If you could live anywhere else, where would you be?

Cunting Blogger. Shit-eating, dog- wanking bastards.

Why does Blogger hate me enough not to let me comment on other blogs by telling me they dont exist and that I'm forbidden to access and look at my own blog?

Oooh another Meme thing!

(honestly these things are awesome when you dont know what to blog about or have too much going on in your head that you don't know how to blog about!)

Here are the Rules! If anyone else wants to play:

Leave your name and
1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jelly to wrestle with you in.
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.

And here's Flash's reply!

1. You've done a nudey photoshoot! (I can see I'm never going to be able to forget about that!)
2. Is this the way to Amarillo. (Shalalalala. We sent the Pal-arse down!)
3. Orange & lime! (Whooooo!)
4. "You just cant beat a saveloy!" (Honestly people Saveloys are the greatest invention ever created by the Chipshop Gods.)
5. Again falling by your blog & revealing myself! (I still remember your 1st comment was about me calling Dad a silly fucker after hurting himself at hospital, and you "spurted coffee everywhere after laughing" 1/09/04)
6. A cute little squirrel. (awwww)
7. Isn't it about time we had another drink up? (YES, YES Oh God Yes!! I'd suggest this weekend but that maybe a bit short notice and Dad's escaping from hospital this weekend [hopefully - fingers crossed] after being in all week. Plus its E's 24TH (so old!!) on Friday.
Hmmm. Charltons at home next weekend so how bout the weekend after that - the 8th?)

So if anyone else wants to play leave a comment and I'll try and get back, in between trips to the hospital, and painting The Brats new room.


*update*

Hydey-Hyde-Hyde!

1. You own the most gorgous cat.
2. Ever since that blog I did about my reading and imagination and you responded about playing Kathy on the Moors, You've made me think of Kate Bush's Wuthering Heights.
3. Strawberry. (Its the best flavour and as you're first to reply you get my favourite type!)
4. "Want to come play in my secret treehouse?"
5. The 1st post I ever read of yours, done shortly after your brothers accident, although It was a few months before I became a regular commentator.
6. A bee, specifically a Worker Bee as in your blog you come across as someone always on the go, buzzing here, there and everywhere.
7. (Forgive me if its a common name in America, but I've never come across it here) Is your real name short for something? (If that comes across as revealing too much of your "real" Idenity (bollocks everytime I spell that it looks wrong) my back-up question is: If you could change your name to anything what would it be?


SPINS!!!!!!!!

1. Our real names are really similar (The first 3 letters anyway!)
2. Pretty in Pink! - just cos of your blog template I think!
3. Lime! (next favourite!)
4. "The universe changes daily, and tomorrow the reading could look very different."
5. Being annoyed by your name for a few days before venturing over to look and find out who you were (I absolutely loathe the term "Spinster", it reminds me of spiders and bad witches in the fairy tales. Of course you've since then explained the reasons behind the name) LOL! No hard feelings huh?
6. Dolphin, with an appearance of peacefulness and zen.
7. What exactly is your job title and job description?

So. I abandoned my usual place in the bottom of the East Stand and ventured into the reaches of the Upper North.
Once I got over my vertigo, I decided it was quite a nice view and amused myself by waving at my family in our usual positions.
I was amused by the 6 lads of about about 16-17 behind me who were gently mocking the lad with them who was obviously a little "slow" but they did it without any real malice and indeed it was clear that they were very fond of him, which just goes to show not all kids are manky, cruel little shits.
I changed my mind about my position once the game started, my crap eyesight made it hard to identify the team when they got down the South Stand and indeed I was having problems distinguishing the numbers, let alone read the names of the team or see their faces as I can from my usual place.
But the atmosphere was better compared to the usual quietness of where I sit, although I like my seat and don't want to change it.

3-1! Things definately perked up once half time came and went and Bent and Murphy came on. Lloyd Sam was very impressive and when Jay Bothroyd came on he too perked things up and I think it was a pretty well deserved win.

Oooh Inspired by Spinsterwitchs post a few days ago, and a stunning bit of boredom, I'll take you on a tour of my house.
Lets start with where I'm sat right now. The living room.









This is where Dad sits or lies all day long, (Ignore the dirty washing in the corner please!)
Admire that awful tacky display cabinet and look! There is my Graduation picture in the bottom there (Pride of place Dontcha know?)

















And here's where I sit! Admire Fred my faithful computer that survived 3 and a half years of uni! (No Prizes on guessing what website it's displaying! ) Look its Sky Sports News (Is that Alan Shearer?) Admire the two very belated Birthday cards and the pictures of my dearly beloved and much missed Labrador dog! and see Dad's medicine in the corner there

On to the Next room!

Now we're into the back room, known as the Birds Room,where The Brat has been sleeping for now, since the builder put his foot through his old room! Note the mess!













And these are my feathered friends! Well some of them! from l-r we have Cecil, Satan, Briar and Scramm, not pictured are Plop the disabled budgie and Pasta the other blue budgie.

We'll skip the kitchen, everyones seen a kitchen before and look into the garden, its looking a bit sorry for itself now, Mum's not much of a gardener and Dad's too tired to look after it really.
Admire his Bollocks-to-the-world shed! Built the year we knew the cancer had spread to his lungs in a fit of tell-me-to-rest-and-i'll-tell-you-where-to-go!

Up the stairs we trot and ignore the bomb site that soon will become The Brat's new room and here is my room! I know its a mess but honestly what do you expect with my stuff, my Derby stuff, my Brat's stuff and attic junk in there!
Do you like the colours? Me and Mothership fought over the lime and orange clashing but I think it goes well.













I need now to introduce you to someone very special. This is Champion (anyone remember Champion the Wonder Horse?) I've had him longer than I've owned The Brat. When I was little I used to practise my riding position on him, now I'm scared to sit on him in case he collapses. His mane is a little threadbare and Mum threatens to bin him calling him moth-eaten!

So here's the final stop on the tour, I'd better show you the results of a summer of disruption by the cock-sucking builder (mate call me gorgeous once more I'll spit in your fucking coffee, you know what my name is, use it!)

4,593!!!!

I'm really getting too excited over a competition I cant win!

Why am I such a doormat?
Why can't I say no to people because I'm too worried about hurting them!
We're up to 4,544.... Who will be number 5,000?

Cold Chinese takeaway.
The nicest takeaway ever?
Its nicer cold than warm.

Discuss.

Ahh well.
As much as we'd have liked to win could you really have seen it happening in your wildest dreams?
We did really well in the first half, proper challenging Chelski.
I think Deano's gonna have a real effort getting back into the squad after a few of Anderson's displays.
It was only a short period in the 2nd half that let us down and then it was harder to get back into it.
2-0 I think was a bit harsh.

Tuesday's Hartlepool in the cup and we may be planning an away trip to West Brom!
Bring it on!

I predict that some time over the weekend or early next week We'll hit the big 5,000!

There'll be a mystery prize for whoever's the five thousandth person or who ever's nearest.

No cheating and hitting "refresh" when it gets close though!

In the event of no one claiming 5,000 and someone claiming 4,999 and someone else claiming 5,001. We'll round up so that the 4,999th person wins the prize.

Good Luck!

I think on the whole I've proved I can take some shit.
I can deal with the fact that my friends are moving on with their lives, careers, relationships, homes and I've gone back a step.
I can deal with the guy that I was starting to fall for over the summer, sees me as "one of the lads" and nothing else.
I can deal with the job centre hassling me.
I can deal with the fact that everyday I see something Dad can't do that he could do yesterday.
I can learn to deal with the fact that soon I'll be washing and dressing him.
I can deal with the fact that I'll be caring for Mothership too and that she thinks there's no escape for me again. That when I leave London I'll be taking her with me and as far as she's concerned when she gets old I'll care for her, no questions asked.
I can deal with The Brat's mocking about my shittiness at driving and inability to get a job.
But there's only so much a girl can take. Even a non-sissy, non-girly-girl one like me.

I've never taken that much attention over my appearance, I've always made sure to look neat though and my hair, it lives in a scrunchy ponytail.
But its falling out, and in great clumps too. You can notice it in the ponytail, how thin and sparse it looks, so far I cant see any bald patches on my head but I'm frightened of being totally bald.
I've joked to Mum about how I always threatened to shave my hair off but I don't want to lose it all.
Maybe this is a totally over the top over-reaction to nothing.
But if it all falls out then I'm buying the funkiest, most garish wig ever in the history of wigs. No way am I hiding it all under one of those daft sunhats.
We'll just see what the hairdresser says tomorrow and if she reckons I need to see a doc about it.
And I'm not sure how much more shit I can take and still keep smiling.

Question.

Bald women - fuckable or repulsive?

Oooh. Tagged by Weenie!

5 Things

5 things that really irritate you
-The crazy guys at the Job centre who keep calling me in to discuss why I don't have a job and suggest me going back to school for more GCSE's/ALEVElS. I'm caring for a terminally ill man. Does that explain why I don't have a job?
-That 50p/half a dollar guy. He looks like a fucking chipmunk. Nob.
- That 3 advert (for benefit of you americans, its a bunch of crazy japanese women getting orgasmic over plastic glowing cannisters that play tunes when you open them up, then the police come with furry earmuffs, bark a lot and one of the women escape down a drain.) What The Fuck?
- Saturday morning tv, bring back SMTV!
- Insommnia *sigh*

5 things you like a lot
Football.
Cricket.
Reading a good book
Laughing.
Sleeping.

5 Music Albums

Green Day - American Idiot.
Queen - Greatest Hits.
Iron maiden (My brothers nicked the CD so I can't name it off the top of my head.)
The free one that was in The Sun the other weekend. - It had my current favourite Cheesy song on it Avenues and Alleyways.
Confessions of an idiot! - hehehehehe!

5 Songs
-Well I'm always humming "english country garden" everyone knows the tune and joins in to the end bit when I start humming it but no-one seems to know the words or who did it.
-Hanson - Mmmbop one of my most favouritest cheesy songs ever.
-The Lightning Seeds - Pure
-Stephen Fretwell - Emily.
- Offspring - why don't you get a job?


5 Musics in your IPod (mp3 player) (I don't own a Ipod or MP3 player so we'll stick the media player on the computer on and list the 1st five random tunes that pop up.

Jason Mraz - The Remedy.
Queen - My Best Friend.
Evanscence - My Immortal
Guns 'n' Roses - Patience
Animaniacs theme!

Hehehehe. Nice bit of randomness there.

I can't be bothered to tag anyone so If anyone wants to take it feel free

WE WON BACK THE ASHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got into the cricket during the last Ashes when I'd come home from 6th form and watch them with Dad.
Unfortunately I then went to uni and lacked SKY and MH and CL didn't understand and didn't want to spend the whole day glued to channel 4, not when This Morning with Fern 'N' Phil was on.
So I've missed out on a whole lot of the re-making of the team, apart from the fact that I fell deeply in love with "Freddie" Flintoff.

I've been glued to this series all summer and WE WON! WHOOOOOO! It's been so long and did anyone else have their heart in their mouth at the way they tossed the little urn around?!

He looked quite embarrassed.....

"I need to ask you something. When The Mothership goes into hospital for her operation, well I'm gonna need someone to help me wash my hair and dress and stuff."
Me: (in my head) oh God no, please, please, please no.
Him: "Will you help me?"
Me: (Out loud) "yeah sure, we'll sort something out."

A warning........


It made me laugh anyway. Look at the little wanking demons chasing the poor kitten!

I've always lived in a world of my own, ever since I can remember I've had a vivid imagination.

Personally I blame my Mothership for teaching me to read at an early age, Its also one of the best things she's ever done for me and I pity everyone who finds reading hard. How I love to escape from my real world into a book.
I remember teaching myself to read too by listening to those taped books, the disney ones you got and following the words on the page and my favourite was "She-ra and the Golden Goose"
I cant remember not being able to read and reading novels when my classmates were still reading what I considered babyish.

I took those stories and adventures and played them out, sometimes with my classmates, sometimes with The Brat, sometimes with OF and her brother and sister and mostly on my own.

I must have looked strange playing on my own..

I was Bambi when the leaves fell at autumn, pawing them aside to find the grass, I was a wolf running in a pack hunting, as I peddled my bike furiously.

I was Mina Harker hunting Dracula, I was Robinson Crusoe and Bertha Rochester, occasionally Jane Eyre but Bertha was always more fun, and wasn't I over the moon when I read "Wide Sargasso Sea"? I was Nancy fighting off Sykes in Oliver Twist, I was the Hunt brothers going around the world catching wild animals. I rode Black Beauty every time I went on the little ponies at the stables. I was Cathy running across the moors, wild and restless. I was Ahab catching whales and Scout meeting Boo Radley.

I was eight or nine and they were more real to me than my live friends and I plagurised the books shamelessly in my own stories for school work. My teachers didn't think I really read those books and understood them but I took the gist of the story and made it my own, perhaps I missed all the deep meanings of who Heathcliff was, I thought he was a prat and it wasn't until I got older that I truely realised his character and how he loved Cathy and why he hurt everyone else.
I think they forgot sometimes when they saw me ploughing through The Mill On The Floss or Vanity Fair that they were just stories. They quizzed me on the relevance of the Cunninghams in To Kill a Mockingbird and I didn't pick that up when I was 9 and they took that as me not understanding what I was reading, but I did. They were stories.

I made up stories in my head, I wrote them down on paper, I acted out dramatic parts often being two or three character when I played on my own.

And as I grew older my sense of randomness increased, I fell in love with Monty Python and the more my own sense of loneliness increased, through school and my misery at being at home the more I went into my own world and I suppose I was like Peter Pan, my sense of humour never grew up, I find childish things more fun than supposedly grown-up humour, I still love jumping in puddles, and rolling around in bubble-wrap and I still love reading more so than watching TV and films. Now I'm older I return to my "friends" and I understand them so much more and love them still. And I love retreating into my own little world of randomness that gets me strange looks from others and keeps me sane in what ever situation I find myself in and I hope that continues.

Where has all this led too? Well I've found me a secret tree-house so to speak. And I've been "playing" in it all summer and today I realised just how in depth I've made that fantasy world.

A game! I love games!

1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below asking to be interviewed.
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different.
3. You will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.



Questions posed by Flash!

1. If you had the misfortune to fall head over heels for one of those strange men that don't like football, what would you do? Well the BB hated football and complained lots when I made him watch MOTD and Football Focus. As long as he didnt mind me going to the football and hanging out with my lads to watch games I think we'd get on very well. We could come to some kinda agreement. Most blokes tend to with their none-football liking birds. I could see it causing some problems if Portsmouth/Bolton on a Tuesday night clashed with Eastenders, but I'm sure I could come to some arrangement where I got to see the game. That is if the guy knew what was good for him! Grrr! Lets hope that dreadful scenario never takes place though.
2. Do you see yourself living in London in 5 years time? If not, where? I don't want to be in London, if things were ideal I'd just apply all over the country and see where I ended up. I think I'd really like to live in Cornwall at some point though, I love the seaside and I thought it was a really pretty place when I visited.
3. Why do girls love horses? Hmmm Toughie, I can only talk for myself, I love the power trip and trust. You've got something there that's 7 foot tall and weighs on average half a tonne, can travel at 30mph and when you get that special partnership between you, that horse will walk through fire for you, it'll walk past something it sees as terrifying (even if it's just a squirrel.) It'll jump its own body height (and horses only jump cos we've taught them too, wild ones rarely do) because it trusts you. And all you have to control it is a thin bar of metal and leather, your own body signals and believe me, you can't make a horse do anything it don't want to do and when you have that kind of trust between something that can seriously damage you, its awe-inspiring. I've seen 4 year old children handle one-tonne Shires, when adults have shied away because they have no fear and they have the same trust in the horse that the horse has for them. And finally I love their gentleness, kindness and beauty.
4. Ice cream has been banned worldwide & is now regarded with the same moral disdain as drugs. Would you give up or get yourself a dealer at the risk of being criminalised? I'd need a dealer, but as long as I still had my peanut butter I think I could try and cut down on the addiction but I'd still have to have occasional fixes.
5. How would you describe your emotions when you recently had to be naked in the name of art? From disrobing to seeing the finished articles.
Well first of all it was shock that I'd been asked, and I asked several times that it wasn't a wind-up and why wasn't he going for one of his better-looking female friends. On the day itself I was very nervous, I can't even go topless on the beach and I was expected to strip off in front of a guy I'd known since I was 11, his sister and a make-up artist. When he showed me what he wanted me to wear in some of the shots I was more amused than anything else and I felt like a prat really, I closed my mind to my nakedness and just felt stupid in some of the poses he asked for. Having seen the pics now I'm quite proud of them. I don't plan on showing them to anyone else though.

What The Fuck?

Why is nothing exciting happening to me??

Dont'cha just love MSN chats that fall into randomness?
Here's me and the Sheep.


Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
i am the only one who is slipperless
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
im slipperless too
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
a big spider called bert took up residence in my left slipper and threatened to mug me if i evicted him
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
interesting problem. perhaps a bigger slipper u can share...?
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
no. he's very greedy. he's like a what do you call 'ems? a homeless guy that takes over an empty house
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
squatter
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
as long as they dont damage anything they are not breaking the law
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
thats the dude
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
thats what he says. so he's not moving out
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
u are within your rights however to smoke em out. its your property so it counts as fumigation. its his own fault for being there
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
he's threatened a campaign of terror on me though
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
hmm, some sort of economic sanctions maybe?
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
maybe. we are negotiating a move to the busy lizzie flowerbed and all the bugs he can eat
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
eah! what kind of life does he have in a slipper? only dust mites to eat and a permanant strange semll folling him around
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
well theres a healthy quanity of woodlice to chew on and at the moment a lot of daddy long legs about
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
its indoors too and warm which is his main arguement
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
hmm, slippers are like caravans. they can be towed elsewhere...
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
the fridge perhaps
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
the fridge........ hmmm no good. he runs the risk of getting squished then and i dont wanna get done for murder
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
then outside under a bucket to keep the rain off
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
a..... buck........et
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
?????
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
yes, a young male deer whats been caught and et
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
ojh
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
poor bambi
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
but put to good use as a slipper warmer and spider distarcter
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
distractor*
Luke Young! What a legend! says:
I like to think that soon he'll make the short jump to the porch. theres a whole row of boots that he can move into
Shakespearean Humour : twonk your petard! says:
neat, but a danger he'll spread his stuff and invite family round

Look at Puppy Dotty! She belongs to OF and came to visit Tuesday.




Altogether now... Aaaaawwwwww!



















Isn't she gorgeous?

Feeling kinda sorry for myself today.
All my summer friends are buggering back off to uni or to their respective homes before uni starts, I keep thinking too that I should be getting ready to go to Derby too, even though I left in January!

The weather don't help, in that it totally exhausts me and makes me sleep all day and night and although I don't do much with my days, I do feel cheated by sleeping through a day, like its a day wasted before I die.
Speaking of dying. Dad's not being the most chirpy of persons. How dare he feel sorry for himself! Anyone would thinking he's dying! He really hated the hospice and we sat and talked about it today and if the inevitable comes I think we're gonna try and get him into hospital.
He's been shattered by the heat too, part of his lung's collapsed and the radiotherapy buggered up part of his other lung so when its airless like this he finds it hard to breathe.

I need something to keep my brain occupied and stop me feeling sorry for myself, so I'm thinking of starting some courses at Woolwich College. Whether I actually get round to enrolling or its just another one of those ideas I have that I never actually follow through is anyone's guess.

I joined the bone marrow register today! Hurrah for me!